Around the world with Missy-Bammie

Baby Steps

2012-01-05T12:46:00.002-07:00

I need to do this...they are not resolutions cos we break resolutions all the time...i not even sure if I can really do this but my mantra to myself everyday will be "Baby Steps, Van.....Baby Steps, Van"....2011 has been hell of a rollercoaster for me and while I would be confident to say that despite all the sadness and uncertainty I have felt in the last year, I am happy to say that my dominant nature of pure optimism is still very much with me and for that, I thank the Universe for it. Without that, life for me will be pure misery.

But at the same time, during the last 6 mths especially, I feel I have totally let myself go in both emotional and physical well being and I need to take mini baby steps to move back to a state of peace with my emotions and my body.

I haven't ate well...unless you count fast food and Nissin instant noodles as wholesome :-).....haven't been exercising AT ALL....ya, not even the stairs....haven't been making myself look pretty or feel pretty....I have just let myself go totally and that is not good :-(

So first baby steps today:

Day 1:
- Drink 2 cups of green tea for the remaining work day (it's only 4 hrs..hang in there, van)
- Walk 15 minutes at 3pm whether someone is going w you or not

2 More Hours to 2012

2011-12-31T22:06:00.002-07:00

In 2 more hours, it will be the start of a new year....the last few years have been a lot of ups and downs for me...but in 2012.....in 2012, I will officially be a divorcee (i still cringe whenever I say that out aloud)....in 2012, I am going to buy my very first home on my own....while it's all exciting, honestly, it is more scary than exciting....I am going to be 35 in 2012....divorced, broke, fat (well okay...technically, in canada, I am not seen as Fat but I feel Fat okay), emotionally needy...

it's pretty ironic....while I have always known that I have learnt a lot from my divorce and that I am strong enough to weather any storms that come my way, I am also a lot weaker than I think I am....on the surface, it feels as if I am alright....but the truth is I have always been insecure and this divorce has brought all my insecurities all up to the surface again....I feel once again like the insecure girl in secondary school everyone dislikes....as a result, I settle for poor behavior in men...I am an emo wreck underneath that calm happy surface...but i know I will get past this....everyone does...life doesn't stop when your life sucks...when your dad dies...when your hubby tells you he wants a separation...life moves on...and so will I....and the new year will bring new beginnings, new opened doors and new things for me to be grateful about.....fuck you, my insecurities!!! you are not ruling my life....i am not going to write sad poems about you...cos y9ou fucking dun deserve it.,...go find someone else to play with cos you ain't coming into my life....

Happy New Year everyone :-) I love me for exactly who I am

Day 2

2011-08-04T10:06:00.004-07:00

So yesterday, I called out on a girlfriend (well, at least I used to think she was my friend) for texting Jeff on Plenty of Fish website...and of cos, she was all sorry about it and she said she didn't mean it at all and that she wasn't in any way trying to hook up with my ex. I hadn't planned on calling her out on it but it just happened and now, I dun think I can ever trust her again. Her intentions might have been totally innocent (which I doubt so...which friend will text your ex on a dating website with innocent intentions?puke). And even tho I know she is totally fucked up in her life right now because of her separation, but being fucked up is Okay...Being a fucked up and a conniving bitch is not Okay....especially to the only girlfriend who actually physically went out of her way to help you. She probably vented her separation story to the whole office building but i think I am the only one girl who actually did some physical help and this is what I get in return. But as the saying goes, there is always a silver lining....& This is what I am grateful for today.

I am grateful for:

knowing now than later that really, Fiona is not to be trusted fully & that it was a waste of my time to ever worry for her so much as a friend. I wish her all the best in her single journey but ya, Karma does bite you in the ass, Bitch!..lol

again, Jeff for being the solid rock in my life who got more angry than me at Fiona because he would not allow any shit disturber to create trouble between the both of us

co-workers whom I can vent my stories to in the morning :-)

Life is still good

Day 1

2011-08-03T13:12:00.004-07:00

Yesterday - Sucks. Had a fight. Back to his "Poor Me" mentality and how he never makes me happy and how he always seems to fuck up...Half of him wants out of this...Great! Just the answer I need for my life right now...My point - why can men never decide what they want? I'm sorry dude...in my life, you are either IN or OUT completely....so until you figure out what you want, You are OUT! Surprisingly, I got to fall asleep relatively fast at 9.30pm without being too upset about it. Maybe it's a sign. Whatever...

Day 1 - Suprisingly, I feel alright...it could be better but on the whole, I feel alright..After all, it's HUMP day....can't be that bad right?LOL...I'm still not as upset and crazy as I thought I was gonna be....maybe that will come in the next few days....hopefully not...This is Day 1 of no texting, no emails and no phone calls...I dun feel much like working though...I am starting today as Day 1 of "No Contact" & Day 1 of a new healthier lifestyle & Day 1 of starting a "Grateful" journal here...In fact, I am gonna make sure I show my wellness coordinator at work every Friday my meals journal and start being accountable for the food choices I make...I figure at least, I could try to get myself slimmer without a man....cos dating does make you fatter..I swear!! LOL....did a 15 mins walk at 10am today and am going for Jazzercise tonight!!! I need to punch someone....so the exercise will be good :-)

So I am gonna do a "Grateful" Journal for the next 2 weeks every single day on my blog...It just means that every day, I will write 3 things I am grateful for in life.

Today, I am grateful for having my 2 dogs, a very wonderful relationship with my ex-hubby and the elusive sun at Fort St John....

A Poem

2011-04-15T22:12:00.001-07:00

Days where everything just seem to not feel right

Days where everything just seem to fall into shattered pieces

No matter what you say, no matter what you do

Things just doesn’t seem good enough

The sun just doesn’t feel warm enough

The void in your heart just doesn’t close quite tight enough

The tears in your eyes just doesn’t dry quite fast enough

Is the puzzle of life ever going to be pieced correctly enough for me?

Lost

2011-03-25T21:46:00.002-07:00

I am lost....I am at a crossroad in my life....I am at a loss what to do....I feel like I have lost a part of myself in this journey....and yet at the back of my mind, i think i know exactly what i need to do to make things right back on track for me...

but there is so much fear in me in making my loved ones unhappy....I strive to make them happy...and for the sake of not rocking the boat, I end up being the miserable and unhappy one..

I can't move forward...can't move backwards...i feel like a fucking self-pitying, self-obsessed bitch....

Ben, Jerry & Me On a Friday Night

2010-07-31T01:24:00.005-07:00

It's a Friday Night & It's a Happy One (^_^)

Me with my Ben & Jerry Ice Cream and it's one of my all time Favorite flavor - Chocolate Fudge Brownie!!!!

Did you know that the people who started this business is really 2 jocks by the name of Ben & Jerry and they are supposedly the best of friends when they started this business.....i bet they never imagine then that they will be this BIG eh???

And did you also know that they have this flavor called "Hubby Hubby", which was created to celebrate the legalization of gay marriages in Vermont?? I think that's pretty Gay (No pun intended..lol)....and i wish they had this flavor here so i could try it...the box just looks sooo cute with 2 men getting married...

And did you also know that Ben & Jerry has their own graveyard...It's called the Flavor Graveyard and visitors can come pay their respects to...hmmmm, the dead flavors, i guess....lol.....

As a result of their constant efforts to come out with new flavors all the time, there are also quite a number of flavors that never makes it to the market...hmm, for example "Ice Tea with Ginseng" ice-cream....what were they thinking??? hahhaaa....well, kudos at least for creativity....so these flavors are sentenced to death and buried in the Flavor Graveyard.....some visitors who goes there actually leave flowers there....hmm, now, that's just CREEPY......

Well, i think this is enough of writing and i should get back to Mr Ben & Mr Jerry (^_^)....have a good weekend, everyone

Muacks...

Bammie's French Toast

2010-07-04T12:18:00.007-07:00

It's hard sometimes for me to remember these days that it's often the little things in life that makes us smile....and which is why even though this recipe still doesn't beat the ones my husband and my mom has, i am gonna post it anyway...because it will always remind me that even in tough times, all we need are small little things to make us smile...after all, tough times never last....but tough people does...

So, anyone who reads my blog should know that i really like a hearty breakfast during the weekends and if it involves fluffy good french toast, it can never go wrong with me...I can never be depressed or unhappy with my fluffy French Toast buddy (i should say buddies...lol..cos i always have to have 3 of them...lol)

Well, the recipe is from allrecipes.com which is a website i use often...

Ingredients:
2 Tbsp All Purpose Flour
1/2 Cup Milk
1/2 Pinch Salt
2 Eggs
1/4 Tsp Cinnamon Powder
1/2 Vanilla Extract
2 Tbsp Sugar
6 Slices White Bread

Measure flour into a large mixing bowl. Slowly whisk in the milk. Whisk in the salt, eggs, cinnamon, vanilla extract and sugar until smooth.
Heat a lightly oiled frying pan over medium heat.
Soak bread slices in mixture until saturated. Cook bread on each side until golden brown.
Always whisk the mixture before soaking bread. Otherwise, flour will float below.
Serve hot with maple syrup & berries....

And just as i was enjoying my breakfast on my couch, i just by accident hit a tv channel that i usually never press and it was showing the Dalai Lama's visit to Canada....I can't say i am a huge fan of him or the politics that he is involved in but i have read some of his books in the past and it has always, in a very surreal way, given me some form of peace...but in the midst of pursuing the things i thought will bring me happiness, i got caught up in my little world and i forget that the world is larger than i am and that no matter what challenges i am facing, i need to realize and be grateful that i am an able-bodied human being with family & friends who love me.....with a personality that belongs to me & me only.....so, watching Dalai Lama by chance this morning brought me back to where i truly want to be....

Quotes From the Dalai Lama

"If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion."

"I find hope in the darkest of days, and focus in the brightest. I do not judge the universe."

"I believe all suffering is caused by ignorance. People inflict pain on others in the selfish pursuit of their happiness or satisfaction. Yet true happiness comes from a sense of peace and contentment, which in turn must be achieved through the cultivation of altruism, of love and compassion, and elimination of ignorance, selfishness, and greed."

"I believe that the very purpose of life is to be happy. From the very core of our being, we desire contentment. In my own limited experience I have found that the more we care for the happiness of others, the greater is our own sense of well-being. Cultivating a close, warmhearted feeling for others automatically puts the mind at ease. It helps remove whatever fears or insecurities we may have and gives us the strength to cope with any obstacles we encounter. It is the principal source of success in life. Since we are not solely material creatures, it is a mistake to place all our hopes for happiness on external development alone. The key is to develop inner peace."

Finally,

bon appétit

Hedley - Perfect

2010-06-20T18:04:00.000-07:00

I really really like this video....

I Eat...Therefore I Am

2010-06-20T17:34:00.003-07:00

Lately, what bammie feels like eating, she gets to eat it..well, mostly....

& most times these days, i'm really eating mindlessly and not really even savoring the taste or even liking it to begin with....well, with the very rare exception of breakfast.....somehow, to me, the best way to start my weekend is to begin it with a awesome breakfast and I'm your ultimate North American girl in this aspect...My idea of a perfect breakfast is 3 pieces of fluffy heavenly french toasts with maple syrup drizzled all over, 2-4 sausages, mashed potato patties pan-fried to golden perfection and of course, not forgetting the 2 perfectly cooked over easy eggs...AND COFFEE!!!

anyway, I am as usual, digressing from my main topic...

well, back to my neurotic eating habits....I have always been a big eater and a foodie...but i know how i feel when i used to eat...I used to feel happy....these days, i just feel numb....i hope this phrase goes away soon....because if i am not even enjoying the food, it is just wasted calories....

And despite everything, i know this is just a phrase in my life i cannot avoid....i like to think that all of us on earth has a road to travel.....some people get to their destination faster....some people (like me & millions of other women...so stop the self-sympathy, YOU....Yes, i mean YOU ^-^) take longer to get there....

& the truth is, what is there really for me to be jealous of the women who get to their destination faster?? Because of my longer route, i get to have so much interesting and exciting experiences that only belongs to me and myself!!!...At least, when i do die, i can say my life has been a pretty interesting ride....

Chicago Audition!!!!

2010-06-20T02:16:00.002-07:00

Today is a pretty chirpy & productive day....

Went for my 1st audition for the Chicago musical that's due to play here in end October and early November...Before my audition even started, i already had the executive director from the drama organization repeating twice to me that she doesn't think i will get a part since I am Asian and I have an Asian accent & there are pretty limited roles in the Chicago musical....dun get it wrong...this lady wasn't trying to discourage me...In fact, i believe she truly believed i had no chance in it and was trying to ask me not to be discouraged....but despite her kind intentions, I was pretty discouraged....I mean, i haven't even started my audition!!

But anyway, I was paired up with another girl (also came for the audition) and for our first act, I was asked to act as Roxie and she was acting as Billy Flynn, the unscrupulous lawyer...Surprise Surprise...I think i did pretty well....(^.^)

& the 2nd act, we were both asked to read out a passage out from the "Cell Block Tango" act....& at the end, we both were asked to come back next sat 3pm for our 2nd audition (the singing & dancing part)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm sooooooooooooooooooooo excited.........when i came out of the audition room, you could tell from the executive director's expression that she was totally taken by surprise that i was asked to come back next sat.....ohhhhh, that expression was priceless....I know I know...i really do know that she didn't mean anything mean at all about what she said to me....in fact, she kept telling me that there would be many other plays where she totally thinks that there will be a more suitable role for me...

Anyway, i am really ecstatic....i know that maybe my chances still are not very high...but hey, if i think i can do it, I CAN DO IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.....(^.^)

Actually, I have always had an interest to be on stage playacting one day but i guess, along with many other secret dreams & desires, the interest dims year by year, month by month, day by day ...until it becomes a distant memory..

It seems that we are forever preoccupied with tasks and challenges that it is, itself a challenge just to unlearn that preoccupation with our daily goals and learn how to live in the moment....to learn how to enjoy quiet happiness....to learn to connect back with our dreams....& most importantly, to learn to listen to that inner voice inside of all of us....

Life generally still sucks, no matter what....but hey, since we still have to stay on earth at this moment (well, until we die).....we might as well try to make this journey a better one....

Senses

2010-06-05T21:29:00.013-07:00

I see with clarity from the eyes of an inquisitive child
knowing that as long as i have the courage to seek, i'll find my pot of gold under that elusive rainbow

I smell with clarity the aroma of fresh brewed coffee in the early morning
knowing that i owe myself the responsibility to love me

I hear with clarity the sound of my heart's beating
knowing that my life can be as big as i want it to be

I consume with clarity the arousing tastes of life
knowing that I'm worth all the pleasuring

I touch with clarity the comforting closeness of my dogs
knowing that the best way to make a difference to your own life is to touch someone else'

i feel with clarity the wisdom of the old lady looking back at me in the mirror
knowing that even underneath the dark clouds, there's always a silver lining

that is if you chose to believe in your senses...

Van aka Bammie

DHL Canada SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2010-06-03T17:49:00.005-07:00

My Letter to DHL

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Honestly, after what i have gone through 25 minutes ago with DHL Call Centre, I am not having much expectations that you will even respond to my feedback but that is still not going to stop me from trying because the kind of lackluster service i have received so far is atrocious, considering how big and international a company DHL is worldwide.

A parcel delivery attempt was made mid last week and we were not at home so the delivery guy left us a DNK notice and i made sure my husband signed immediately and i pasted it on my door to indicate to DHL to leave the parcel at my door. 3 days later, i still have not received my parcel so i called the number on the DNK Notice and the 1st lady officer told me that the delivery guy has attempted altogether 3 times and because we were not at home, so the parcel was routed to Prince George and she asked me to collect from Prince George!! I live in Fort St John. Do you guys even have any idea how far Prince George is from Fort St John? Anyway, i explained to her what happened wasn't my fault and there was no way i was going to drive so many hours to Prince George to collect my parcel, especially since we have already pasted the DNK Notice on my door asking them to leave the parcel outside my house. So, the officer said that she will make a request to route the parcel back to Fort St John and deliver to us again. And again, i waited for a few days and no parcel. I called DHL again on this Monday and a 2nd lady officer told me a completely different story from the 1st officer. I am not going to repeat the story here. If you care enough, I'm sure you can trace our phone conversation to know what quality of call centre officers you have recruited. Anyway, the 2nd lady officer again assured me she will put a note in to ask them to deliver and leave it at my door. Once again, i waited and there was no parcel. I called again 25 minutes ago and a 3rd lady officer again told me a completely different story. It makes me wonder if the problem lies with the people you have hired or the management.

Anyway, she said that they have tried to deliver again today and we were not at home. This is so retarded because we were not supposed to be at home!! That's why we pasted the DNK Notice on our door asking DHL to leave the parcel at our door. I am at my wits end and by this time, i am not even truly concerned if i get my parcel or not but i wanted to file a complaint about this issue. And i told the lady officer to file a complaint for me and i assured her that the complaint is not against her in any way. It's a feedback about the whole experience i have had and I think DHL should take this positively and try to improve their services (even if it's outsourced to another small company in Fort St John). The lady asked me to hold on the line and then hung up on my call. Please tell me that this is not the kind of service DHL wants their customers to experience when they call the Call Centre.

What i would like to have is very simple.

1) My parcel to be left at my door, as indicated in the DNK Notice

2) Someone to call me back acknowledging my feedback and letting me know that DHL still cares about their customers.

Thanks.

Regards,

Van Tay

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P.S: And hey, the last lady officer recommended that i go pick up my parcel from the DHL FSJ office myself tomorrow and the parcel will definitely be there. And GUESS WHAT??????SHE GAVE ME AN ADDRESS WHICH IS NOT EVEN IN FORT ST JOHN!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ........but she insisted and assured me that 117 Clyde Avenue is at Fort St John!!!....

Tarts, Tarts & More Tarts!!

2010-05-30T00:22:00.004-07:00

Tarts are unbelievably the easiest dessert to make....would never have imagined that in a hundred years....and they taste incredibly light that i just ate 6 mini fruits tarts!! And YES, i'm supposed to be watching what i eat....And YES, the mini tarts are really not that mini..hahah....And Yes, it's past midnight now & I shouldn't be eating that much after 8pm....but what the heck!!...LOL....I make my own rules...it has always been like this & it will always stay like this....haha..I will post the recipe another day....but now just showcasing all my attempts at fruit tarts...

Sex & The City 2

2010-05-29T00:22:00.002-07:00

Hoo Hoo!! Just came back from watching Sex & The City 2 and it's one hell of a sparkling show....everything from shoes to diamonds to clothes to necklaces to beds to even curtains shine like hell...they certainly stop at nothing to make everything shiny...(^.^)LOL...

In Sex & The City 2, all 4 girls all seem "happily" settled into their own individual lives...but as everyone of us know, things in life are never truly that simplistic....and we all have our own set of problems and issues in life....whether be it coping with being a single & fearing we will never get married.....to being married but fearing that this is all there is to our lives....to have successfully climbed up the corporate ladder but feeling stuck & unhappy in what we are doing.....to love our children with all that our hearts can possibly give but yet feel happy at the thought of being away from them (cos they drive us NUTS!!!)....

But yet at the heart of all the issues & challenges that the 4 different women faces, there lies a common ground for them - their friendship....& this is what makes Sex & The City 2 such a successful movie....

Sure, we watch it for the glamorous lifestyles, expensive slinky clothes and all that fancy partying....which women doesn't want that?

But at the end of the day, i think a lot of women can relate to the movie (even though story plot obviously is not the biggest focus here & it gets cliche at times...LOL) because in each of us, we can see a little bit of ourselves in the 4 women....we might never be the fashionista that Carrie is but it doesn't mean that we never dream of wanting to look fashionable (otherwise, fashion mags won't sell like hot cakes..lol)...we might never be a successful lawyer like Miranda but it doesn't mean we have not sacrificed our personal life in order to work our way up the corporate ladder....we might never have as AWESOME a sex life like Samantha's but it doesn't mean we never try to knock the socks out of our men so as to ensure a BIG "O" Night!!!lol...and in case you are wondering, "O" refers to Orgasm (^.^)...and who doesn't want to have a great orgasm? Those who said they dun care for it - in my opinion, they just haven't experienced true earthshaking heaven...(^.^), & believe me, it's way better than any food & i'm an avid food lover!!....LOL...

well, if you are going to watch the movie, thinking it be better than the 1st one, you might be just a tad disappointed....the best thing - go in, watch the movie, enjoy the bling & the decadence & come out feeling blessed about the best girl friends that you have (well, provided that you do have best girlfriends)....I'm lucky...I have 3 of them and they have seen the best & worst of me...and they still love me!! I'm one big lucky girl!! (^.^)

now, if only i had one hell of a great smoking body like Samantha, that would make it perfect....hahaa...well, a girl can always dream right?? (^.^)

Bammie's Strawberry Swiss Roll

2010-05-16T14:40:00.019-07:00

if any of you saw the previous swiss roll i made, you will totally understand why i am jumping in joy now....lol....today is my 3rd attempt making a swiss roll or jelly roll (as most Canadians go by) & FINALLY, they are soft and most importantly, i am able to roll them up nicely.....sure, it is still far from the perfect swiss roll...there are still cracks on the cake but i dusted it with icing sugar so it is not soo obvious...

Actually, the most important aspect of making a swiss roll is to make a really good, light & airy sponge cake. It is not difficult to make a sponge cake but to make one that is the right texture & consistency for it to be rolled is the challenging part..

/sweat

The good thing is that if you dun succeed in turning it into a swiss roll, it is a versatile cake & you can just about switch & make it into a variety of desserts such as a trifle cake topped with chopped fruits or just use it instead of lady fingers to make tiramisu (no one can tell the difference anyway...lol).....

Swiss Roll is one of those things that i always loved to eat but never will in a million years, imagine myself baking it from scratch. So, i have to say that i am actually pretty proud of myself in a sort of kind of SMUG way....hahhaaa../wahaha

Now for the recipe:

Ingredients:

5 eggs

1-2/3 cups white sugar

1/2 cup and 1 tablespoon hot water

1-3/4 teaspoons vanilla extract

1-2/3 cups sifted all-purpose flour

1-3/4 teaspoons baking powder

1/2 teaspoon salt

Icing sugar for dusting

Sliced fresh strawberries

Raspberry Jam

Instructions:


1.	Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Line a jelly roll pan with buttered parchment paper.
2.	Beat the eggs until thick and pale yellowish color (Patience & a Mixer is a Must here. Even with a mixer, it took like 10 minutes of beating at medium speed to get the thick consistency i wanted sooo imagine doing it by hand!!...You will just get insane before you get to roll anything...lol). Gradually add the white sugar, beating constantly. Stir in hot water and vanilla extract. Fold in flour, baking powder, and salt. Pour batter into the jelly roll pan.
3.	Bake for 10 minutes. It should be springy to the touch, and beginning to shrink away from the sides of the pan.
4.	Lay out a tea towel, and sprinkle it with confectioners' sugar. Turn the jelly roll out on the towel. Take off the paper or foil. Cut away crusty edges.
5.	Spread with the jam and place the strawberries all around.Roll the cake up in the towel, and leave it to cool. Chill. Dust the top with icing sugar.

NOTES:

Since you want the cake to be all airy and light, you have to be careful when you fold in the flour. Gradually add the flour & use a spatula to lightly fold in the flour. Fold the egg mixture and the flour mixture together very gently as you are trying not to knock any of the air out of the eggs. Heavy & too much handling at this stage will give a flat, tough sponge.
The dusting of the icing sugar is really optional. I like to dust off with it because it helps to cover the cracks of the cake.
Once the cake has finished baking, do not leave the cake to cool for too long. Otherwise, the cake becomes too dry and tear during roll up.
Trim away the crusts/edges which are thinner and more dry, they interfere with the rolling.
Cut the cake into slices using a serrated knife

/bye

I am a ESTP!!!!!! (^-^)

2010-05-07T20:49:00.006-07:00

Just received my Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) assessment results and BOY, the 17 pages report i got is such a true reflection of who i am & how i approach life....

The MBTI assessment is one of the best-known and most trusted personality assessment tool available today...& is often used by many organizations for various reasons....i feel quite lucky to have done the assessment...whether my results were accurate or not is not the most important to me but what is meaningful to me is that often, through such personality assessments, I am reminded once again that we are all surrounded by people who are different....and when someone is different from us and when someone does something that doesn't appeal to us, it doesn't mean anything except that WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT....and i think we should all be grateful for the exposure we get with interaction with different people....whether the interaction was negative or positive, it becomes a valuable experience as long as we make it to be.....it's all in our bloody heads really.....

Okay...back to my results...i have always known what kind of a personality I am....but reading it from a test results still astound me....LOL.....how accurate a damn machine can be....hahaha..

Portrait of an ESTP (Extraverted Sensing with Introverted Thinking)

ESTPs are outgoing, straight-shooting types. Enthusiastic and excitable, ESTPs are "doers" who live in the world of action. Blunt, straight-forward risk-takers, they are willing to plunge right into things and get their hands dirty. They live in the here-and-now, and place little importance on introspection or theory. The look at the facts of a situation, quickly decide what should be done, execute the action, and move on to the next thing.

ESTPs are gregarious and fun-loving individuals who want to make the most of every moment. They love action, and always seem to be doing something. This enthusiasm is carried over to their personal relationships, which they approach with the desire to make the most of their relationships on a daily basis. They tend to get bored easily, and may be prone to switching relationships frequently unless they find an outlet for their boredom elsewhere. They approach life on a day-by-day basis, so long-term commitments are not naturally comfortable for the ESTP. They may feel tremendously committed, but they want to take their commitments day by day.

Sexually, the ESTP approaches intimacy as a tangible, fun way to make the most of the relationship in the present moment. They're keenly aware of their senses, and so are very sensual and earthy lovers. They are likely to view intimacy from a lighter, physical perspective rather than as an opportunity for expressing a lot of verbal affection and affirmation.

Sounds like me eh???? LOL...i think it does...

Bammie's Spinach & Bacon Frittata

2010-05-02T20:05:00.006-07:00

Since I decided to exercise & to eat healthy wholesome food weeks ago, I have made it a point to NEVER SKIP BREAKFAST!! In fact, i'm going to make it a point to eat a wholesome big breakfast every day. There were times in the past where i didn't bother to eat much during breakfast because i didn't feel all that hungry but i have since realized from many sources that skipping breakfast doesn't do anything for you except to slow down your metabolism and as a result, it impedes any of your weight loss efforts....In fact, it is best to kick-start your day with a hearty breakfast such a having 2 fried eggs!!! Now, that's the way i like to start my day (^.^)....I love eggs (any kind) and i can easily have 2 large eggs every morning.....But my problem is waking up in time to fry the eggs....

So, with a Egg Frittata, that totally solves my problem....I usually make them on a Sunday morning, have 1 serving with french toast and freeze the rest into individual portions..that way, every morning, i can just wake up, pop 1 serving into the microwave & "TING", 1 minute later, u have a hot breakfast waiting...I usually try to add some berries so i can incorporate at least 1 serving of fruit first thing in the morning..

Now for the recipe...

Ingredients:

5 Large Eggs and 1 Large Egg White
1/2 Cup Skim Milk
1/2 Cup Shredded Cheese (try to find the ones made with skim milk so it be lower calories)
4 Tbsp ready to eat bacon bits
1 Finely Chopped Onion
5 Finely Chopped fresh Mushrooms
A Bunch of Spinach
Salt & Pepper to taste

Preparation:

Beat all the 6 eggs together with the milk in a bowl
Heat the oil in a skillet/pan
Add the onion, mushrooms, spinach & the bacon bits and stir fry them till onions are a bit caramelized
Once the onion mixture is done, add it to the beaten egg mixture and mix it well
Now in a clean skillet/pan, heat up some oil. When oil is hot, add the whole egg mixture in and put it on medium low heat
Now sprinkle your cheese all over on the top of your omelet.
If you have an oven, you can now pre-heat your oven at 350 degree F & put the whole skillet (make sure your skillet or pan can be used in the oven) inside the oven for about 20 minutes
No worries if you dun have an oven....Just continue cooking it on the stove on low-medium heat till cooked (like the picture below)

I'm showing the pan without 1 serving so that you can see that this whole recipe will make 6 servings of frittatas and I basically just slice them into 6 servings and freeze them in a container.
Just microwave them for 1 minute whenever you want and there you have it.....Healthy Egg Frittata for breakfast with a serving of vegetables...If you add some fruits, it be 2 servings of fruit/vegetable early in the morning....for me, i find it hard to incorporate enough vegetables & fruits as the day progresses...so it helps me extremely to incorporate that early in the morning...

Nutrition:
If you follow the recipe, it is just about 136 calories per serving

2010-05-01T13:10:00.006-07:00

Finally, did my Payroll Exam yesterday and passed it with a 96% score!! I'm happy. ...I wasn't expecting to get a good score though but i knew that i was gonna pass.

I am going to give myself a break and only start the next course in June. I really dun like studying during my weekends....LOL...not that i am doing anything meaningful during my weekends anyway...but i just want to laze.....lazing is my hobby!!!...(^.^)...

So what have i been up to? I made grapefruit meringue pies yesterday.....i seriously didn't think they will come out good since i didn't follow my recipe exactly but they actually taste really good....Ok, i admit I might be biased but hey, it's my blog right??? LOL...sooo it means i can bullshit as much as i want and like.....(^.^) & i got my recipe from this cooking show that i have been following lately...the show is called Bitchin' Kitchen & i am totally digging the show..

As the bitchy name depicts, it's definitely quite different from other cooking shows and i guess that is what draws me to the show...the host looks like a Rock Star with her fully manicured painted fingernails and 3 inches stilettos (hardly the average cooking host)..& most charming is her twisted sense of humor, her accent and her wacky funny straight talking no bullshit wit......and it doesn't hurt that she looks damn good...LOL....she usually has a particular theme in each episode and today at 3pm, the theme is "Rehab Recipes". I can't wait to just crash on my couch with my meringue pie and just watch her show this noon!!!...In a nutshell, it is a pure 30 minutes of sheer twisted rock star entertainment.....(^.^)...& since i finally tested her recipe & it came out great, I'm definitely a Fan now!

& Yes, if i ever lose the pounds i want to, damn i want to do a photo shoot looking like her (Yes! with the 3 inches stiletos and the knife but still looking damn sexy!! LOL)....i know i know....i'm way tooooooo nice a person to look like a bitch & not to mention a rock star looking like a bitch.....hahhaa.....but i can always try...(^.^)...

Since we on the topic of losing weight, I am soo happy to say that i have lost 1.7 pounds this week....the weight is coming off real slow & i dun even know for sure if my scale is really working alright......lol.....but i am choosing to believe in that 1.7 pounds loss...since i have definitely been working hard in my exercise and food intake....i dun want to call it a diet plan cos i dun want it to be a diet plan....it's going to be a lifelong goal to keep myself fit....but ok, let's have the meringue pie first....hahahha....

Bammie's Moose Stroganoff

2010-01-09T20:44:00.005-07:00

Note that Diane's original
recipe uses ground beef
& fresh mushrooms,
whereas I used ground
moose meat & ready to
eat canned mushrooms.

1. Heat oil in a pan.
2. Fry 1 sliced onions
till caramelized.
3. Add in 1 lb ground
moose & fry till meat
is fully cooked.
4. Add in 1 Can of
mushrooms.
5. Add in 1 Can Cream
of Mushroom soup
& switch to medium
heat & let it stew for a while but dun let the cream all
dry out. It should still be really creamy.
6. Now, add in the macaroni (which has been cooked & drained beforehand) to the meat mixture.
I use about 250gram macaroni which in the end result to about 4 servings.

¨♥¨ENjoy¨♥¨

Bammie's Big Round Fat Soft Chewy Cookie

2009-12-28T16:20:00.009-07:00

These babies are soooo tasty and sooo unbelievably easy
to make....that even I cannot believe it....I got the original
recipe from my good friend, Michelle...but I tweaked
it somewhat...But i have posted the original here as well
as a JPEG file soooo anyone can refer to it

Ingredients

2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup unsalted butter, melted
1 cup packed brown sugar
1/3 cup white sugar
2 tsp vanilla extract
2 large Eggs
2 cups semisweet chocolate chips

Preheat oven to 325 degrees F. Line baking tray with parchment paper. Sift together the flour, baking soda and salt; set aside. In a mixing bowl, cream together the melted butter, brown sugar and white sugar until well blended. Beat in the vanilla & eggs until light and creamy. Mix in the sifted ingredients until just blended. Stir in the chocolate chips by hand using a wooden spoon. Drop cookie dough 1/4 cup at a time onto the baking tray & place a chocolate in middle of every cookie. As i didn't really flatten the cookie so while baking, the cookie will flatten slightly and spread into a big round cookie so make sure u leave enough space between each cookie (roughly 2 inches apart). Bake for 17 minutes. When ready, take them out and let them cook on tray for 10 mins and then transfer to a cookie jar or any air tight container. I by accident left 3 cookies on the open and instead of being all soft and chewy, it became crunchy.....but the ones i had put into my cookie jar remained soft and chewy, even after several days.....

Where “Bammie” Came From

2009-10-15T10:50:00.001-07:00

People have been asking me how in the world did i get called Bammie??? Cos it’s sooo part of my name that nowadays, my husband doesn’t even call me Van. He just calls me Bammie, even in public….So it can’t possibly be a mushy name for me….He probably already just think it is MY REAL NAME….LOL

Anyway, i really dun know and dun remember how “Bammie” came about so I surfed the net (as usual) on whether “Bammie” had any real definition at all & OMG!!!!!!!

According to the Urban Dictionary at http://www.urbandictionary.com, “Bammie” means

Underpants/panties (of the male or female variety)

Can’t believe that my name means UNDERWEAR!!!!LOL

Bammie’s Chocolate Layer Cake

2009-10-14T19:16:00.001-07:00

Well, ever since i ate that cake in Winnipeg (thanks! Diane), i now know that layer cakes are not as difficult to make as I had thought. Though it’s probably not as pretty as what it should look like ^_^, but hey, it’s my 1st try….so I am happy. This recipe is quite different from the one I learnt in Winnipeg as I didn’t really want mine to have prunes and my main recipe idea came from this the Canadian Living website.

Click the following link to get the original recipe

Chocolate Layer Cake - Recipes - Food - Canadian Living

So now for my slightly revised recipe

INGREDIENTS

1 Cup of Softened Butter

1.5 Cups of White Sugar

2 Eggs

1tsp of Vanilla Essence

2 Cups of All Purpose Flour

1/2 Cup Cocoa

1 Tsp Baking Powder

1Tsp Baking Soda

1/4 Tsp Salt

1.5 Cups 18% Coffee Creme

INSTRUCTIONS

1. In my Kitchen Aid Mixer, mix together butter and sugar. Preheat Oven to 350°F (180°C).

2. In another big bowl,whisk together your flour, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda and salt.

3. Now add beaten eggs and vanilla to the Kitchen Aid mixer and mix them till smooth batter (I used speed 2).

4. Now add 1/3 of the flour and cocoa mixture and 1/2 of the coffee creme and turn on speed 2 & mix again till smooth.

5. Add another 1/3 of the flour and cocoa mixture and the remaining creme and turn on speed 2 & mix again till smooth.

6. Now, add the remaining flour and cocoa mixture and blend on speed 2 till you get a smooth batter.

7. Spoon into a greased round cake pan, smoothing the top.

8. Bake in Oven for 1 Hr and 10 Minutes or until cake tester inserted in centre comes out clean. Let cool on rack for 20 minutes. Remove from the pan and let cool completely on racks.

9. Cut the cake in the middle and spread your favourite jam or frosting in between. For me, I used Raspberry Jam.

10. ENJOY!!!

Michou, the Cat

2009-09-20T15:19:00.001-07:00

I never liked cats…never liked them at all…but I am soooooooooo in LOVE with Michou now…..i like him soooooooo much that i might tear (ok, maybe i’m a bit too exaggerating here..LOL) just a tiny winy bit when i leave Winnipeg the following week…..

In the first few weeks, Michou was the least friendly among all 5 cats…he was always hissing and growling at me whenever i come near him…

But since I dun know when, Michou is all cuddly when he is near me….If I’m sitting on the couch, he jumps up the couch and sleep on my lap….If I’m on my bed in my room watching a DVD, he again jumps on top of me, purring for me to cuddle him…..he is sooooooooooooo adorable….

And my dogs, especially Jazz is soooooooo fascinated with Michou….LOL, actually, Jazz is fascinated with all 5 cats…..she just lays there, looking at the cats, as if they are cute little babies….she doesn’t even bark at them….if anything, it is usually the cats who hiss and growl at her……hahhaa, isn’t that so cute?

Marriage is Tough...

2009-08-16T06:38:00.002-07:00

I think of myself as a pretty rational & sensible person, especially when it comes to love...and since i didn't enter my marriage with rose tinted glasses expecting it to be all romantic and nice, i knew from the beginning that marriage is tough...but boy, it still is much tougher than i think...

i guess it could also be that i have always been a cynic when it comes to love....my attitude in life is that one cannot choose her own parents and siblings so no matter how much problems there are in my family life, i always have no problems with sucking it up (well, of cos there are the occasional fights^_^ but hey, that's part of family life too right)...but i have always been quite clear & systematic (at least in my bloody head ^_^) that for anyone else, who's not part of my family, for example, friends, colleagues, dates and including boyfriends....if they make my life suck, i put them out of my life.....it's because i feel that this group of people are not my family so I have the right to choose...and that includes boyfriends....a boyfriend, in my personal opinion is not family so i cut them away as soon as i start feeling it doesn't work...all along, i am used to such an internal system within me....i dun like to waste my time and waste someone else time...and this is also precisely why i never introduce or bring a date or boyfriend home...until i was ready to marry jeff, i never had the intention of bringing him home to see my parents......i like this internal efficiency in me....

but what i had forgotten is that other than all the categories of people listed above, there is a special category which i had not prepared for and that is the "HUSBAND" category!!!!.....lol....the source of a husband comes from him being a boyfriend first and so yesterday, this man was a boyfriend and today, this man is a family....so i guess for a cynic like me, i find it incredibly hard to switch this person role so fast.....from someone i can dump or keep (boyfriend) to someone that i have to suck it up no matter what (family)....especially when we have fights, it gets even harder to see this person as the one whom u want to suck it up for the rest of your life....but there are so many days when i wake up and look at him and think "he's the best thing that's ever happened to me & he's family"...

so well bammie, looks like the internal categorizing system u had is not working anymore....it's ok....look at yourself as a factory.....u used to produce only chocolates so u had machinery A but now u are producing gum as well so u have tried it but machinery A no longer works as well.....rather continuing with the mistake, go out there and buy another new set of machinery that will work well with the production of both gum and chocolates....

hahha...am i making any sense at all?>???

2009-07-15T23:06:00.003-07:00

Maybe I really belong to another generation but i dun get it why Singaporeans are forever complaining about Singapore.....

"ERP = Every Road Pays" - Well, in the first place, if you are so damn grouchy abt it, then fucking go take a train like the rest of us....Dun fucking buy a nice car and then fucking complain all the time....it just makes you look nothing but CHEAP

"Singapore SMRT Sucks" - Well, maybe you should open your bloody eyes and travel more often to other countries

"Singapore Govt Sucks" - Well, maybe then you should rise up to the challenge and run for politics...besides, before u ask the govt or the world what they can do for u, ask yourself what you can even contribute to the society or the world at large, other than with your incessant complaining??

"You can say all you want cos U already migrate to Canada ma & U married a WHITE" - ANYONE who cannot see beyond skin color, TO ME, is just plain STUPID.....nothing else...what else can i say to someone who is plain stupid and shallow? Ya, there is something i can say to these people....Go Fuck Yourself....

Daddy's 49th Day

2009-06-24T03:05:00.009-07:00

Today (24 June 2009) marks the 49th day of my beloved daddy's passing. It feels sooo surreal and weird that he has already been gone for 49 days. Weird as it sounds, I still feel that he's with us. I do not consider myself a religious or superstitious person so I am not saying that in a spiritual way. I just seem to feel quite light hearted and happy whenever i think of him. Sadness comes only once in a very long while. So it almost feels to me that he is still happily with us.

But no matter what, I trust that my dad has gone on to a better place, where there is no cancer, no diabetes and no pain.

Traditionally, during the 49 days, children & grandchildren of the deceased cannot wear bright colored clothes, cannot attend weddings or auspicious events (e.g, birth of a child), cannot give ang bao (red packet money) & cannot even cut their hair, but this custom is now usually only observed by older generations. For us, the monk told us that only my mom and brother has to restrain from wearing bright colored clothes but as a gesture of our gratefulness to my dad, my sister and I also refrained from wearing bright colored clothing during this 49 days.

Since it was his 49th day today, we hired a monk to recite prayers for my dad. As for us, we had to prepare in advance 6 dishes, 1 soup and 1 rice for the prayers. Also, we bought and burned some paper money for my dad as well.

When the ceremony was over, my brother-in-law (hear this!!!.....it's my brother-in-law and not my brother) drove us all the way to CCK Columbarium to pray to my dad. We bought some fancy miniature food erasers to decorate on my dad's niches ^_^.....have to find more of daddy's favorite foods so that sister can bring there on dad's 100th day^_^

According to the monk, the 100th day will complete the whole event and bring the funeral to a full closure. On the 100th day, it is optional whether we want to hire back the monk to do a final prayer ceremony. Too bad, I will be back in Canada by then. I would have loved to be here praying to Dad on his 100th final day. Well, life doesn't always go the way we want it to but i already consider myself quite lucky to have been back in time to spend a full month of quality time with Dad, be here to do the funeral arrangements, be here to be with mom till surgery.....what more can i ask for?

Thanks Hubby for your understanding!!! I love YOU

Opera In The Park

2009-06-14T02:05:00.005-07:00

Following the success of its first outdoor opera performance in 2008, Singapore Lyric Opera returns this year with not one, but two performances – Opera in the Park and Opera at the Race Course.

We went to the one held at Shaw Foundation Symphony Stage in Singapore Botanical Gardens. Since it was a Saturday, we were not surprised at the large turn-out rate. Everyone came with their picnic baskets. Singaporeans, expats, foreign workers...you could see that everyone, irregardless of race and nationality, were having a great time. Whether you appreciate opera or not, it doesn't really matter.

I hope in time to come, more Singaporeans are able to see that even though Singapore is a small country but there are still many things that is wonderful about this island...and the fact that i am now living in Canada doesn't change a bit on how i feel about Singapore. If anything else, i now appreciate a whole lot more on the wonderful aspects of Singapore. All I am saying is that there is never a country, a person, a husband, a father, a boss, a colleague, a friend that is 100% perfect. There are always positive and negative aspects of everything.

I absolutely hate it when people tell me that I am lucky to have relocated to overseas cos there is nothing to do in Singapore. To these people, it's not the country that is boring.....IT IS YOU WHO IS BORING!!!

Bammie's 卤面

2009-06-10T02:55:00.006-07:00

哈哈！so happy i finally learn how to make Lor Mee(卤面)...and it's actually quite delicious, considering that it's my 1st attempt orrrr......For the benefit of my non-singaporean readers, let me write out what Lor Mee is.

According to Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia,

Lor mee (Chinese: 卤面) is a Chinese-inspired noodle dish served in a thick starchy gravy and thick flat yellow noodles. The dish is eaten by Hokkiens (Min Nan speakers) in Singapore and Malaysia. The thick gravy is made of corn starch, spices and eggs. The ingredients added into the noodles are usually ngo hiang, fish cake, fish, round and flat meat dumplings (usually pork), half a boiled egg, and other items depending on the stall and the price paid. Vinegar and garlic can be added as an optional item. The dish is also eaten with red chili.

What is worth mentioning is also the fact that Lor Mee is a dish that is highly enjoyed by me and my beloved dad. It's actually one of our favorite dish. That reminds me of the old good times where Dad was still healthy. In the past, Dad would drive us to many different places, all in the search of good yummilicious food...^_^

Anyway, let me not digress and post the recipe here. Instead of pork, I chose to use chicken stock instead. Alternatively, fish stock can be used too.

1) Bring chicken stock with a 卤包(optional) to a boil. Add light soya sauce, dark soya sauce & white pepper to taste.
2) Now, you can use the soup to get ready your other ingredients..for me, I placed 3 peeled hardboiled eggs, prawns, fishcakes & fishballs into the soup and you can take them all out (except the eggs) once they are cooked. I left the hardboiled eggs inside and lower the fire so as to make the soup more tasty, as well as to allow the hardboiled eggs to absorb more soup taste and become darker.
3) When everyone is ready to eat, take out the 卤包& the hardboiled eggs.
4) Now increase the fire for the soup. When it boils, scald the yellow noodles & vegetables (i used 菜心) and distribute them among the respective individual bowls. Distribute all the remaining cooked ingredients & hardboiled eggs among the respective bowls (it is up to you whether you want to slice the hardboiled eggs or not)
5) With the soup still boiling, stir in cornstarch (mix w cold water first) and stir the soup. Once you are happy with the level of starchiness of the soup, drizzle in a beaten egg & stir the soup again.
6) Ladle out the starchy stock over the noodles
7) Garnish with chopped 芫荽(cilantro) & black vinegar & serve it piping hot!!!! ENJOY>...

Feelings...

2009-06-04T09:03:00.004-07:00

Times flies....in another 2 days, my dad would have been dead for a full month....It sounds ironic and weird but daddy's demise has caused me to rethink about a lot of things.....and most of them are positive things.....therefore, even tho i do not consider myself as a religious person, i like and chose to think that it's my daddy who has blessed me with all that....

With my husband, i always get upset when i feel that he does not verbalise enough about his feelings for me...but the truth is...my hubby and my dad are the 2 most important men in my life so instead of always pondering and whining about the unspoken love from him, why dun i chose to focus on the actual actions of love from him? Life is very unpredictable & fragile...although i am sad to see my dad leave us, but I have no regrets or any nagging thoughts because I know that as a daughter, i have done the best i could....but I ask myself all the time "Can i say the same for my hubby?".....if something happens to him tomorrow, can i honestly and trufully tell myself that as a wife, I have done the best i could for our marriage.....the answer is "no"....

so, from now on, I wana focus on being a good wife and a good friend to him. He may never be the man to shower me with sweet nothings in my ears and do exactly what i want him to do...but he is understanding, gives me the space to do the things i love, ambitious, career minded, astute, reliable, dependable, honest, trusts me.........all these are the traits i want in my man....so what can i complain about???

I love you hubby!!!!!....altho I cannot promise that i will never be mad at u again, cannot promise i will never do or say silly things again but i am really trying so be tolerant with me ok???? The bottomline is that U R MOST IMPORTANT TO ME!!!

MUACKS

Still Sick....

2009-04-18T10:09:00.003-07:00

7 days in Singapore already and I cannot believe that I AM STILL SICK!!!!!....hope i will get better soon cos there are still quite a lot of friends whom I have not meet up with yet...

and besides, with my bad flu and cough, I have been banned from going near my dad, in case I spread my virus to him....

Some updates about Daddy....The first 4 days when i just arrived, he was still in good spirits and was eating well and was always asking us to buy him fried chicken wings....and we chatted quite a bit everyday after breakfast....and we will have coffee together

But from the 5th day onwards, he started getting worse again.....it's forever such a roller coaster feeling for us....cos we never know what to expect...but the last 3 days, he is starting to eat lesser and lesser....his stomach is getting more bloated like a balloon.....i have a strong feeling his time will come soon...and i hope it is not a painful one for him....

A part of me still wants him to survive this round, just like he has survived so many previous rounds in the last 7 years.....because like any other human being, I am greedy.....I want more time with him....I even still yearn that he will live to see me having a baby with hubby.....and yet, another part of me wishes that his time will come soon.....because whatever pain we feel when he suffers, he probably feels 100, 1000, 10000 times worse...and i dun want to see him in so much pain....i want him to go in peace...i want him to go peacefully, with the knowledge that our mom will be well taken care of.....i want him to go peacefully, with the knowledge that he is the best perfect dad i could ever have wished for....

Life is such an irony....sigh...

but this is not the time to feel miserable and sad.....i think it is a good time to be reflective....while the loss of a loved one causes us grief, it also reminds us to stop taking other loved ones for granted...

A quote that I really like....

"No matter what you've done for yourself or for humanity, if you can't look back on having given love and attention to your own family, what have you really accomplished?"

- Lee Iacocca

...My Value...

2009-04-13T06:53:00.005-07:00

I know that this trip back to Singapore is a must but i have to admit that there are times in the last 2 weeks before my flight that i wasn't sure if my trip would add much value to my dad's condition...

But today, I am convinced that at this stage in my dad's life, any of his children's presence would definitely add value to his life....

Today, I accompanied him to the dermatology doctor at NUH...a few weeks ago, he had rashes on his skin so they did a skin biopsy on his leg a few weeks ago.....A skin biopsy is the removal of a piece of skin for the purpose of further examination in the laboratory using a microscope......and today, they had to take out the stitches....and because there were hardened pus formed, the doctor had to use a instrument (that looks like a scalpel blade or a knife & manually remove it.....and no local anaesthetic was given....it was sooo painful an ordeal for my dad..imagine someone trying to scrap out some pus from your open raw flesh...that's how painful it is...

Throughout the whole ordeal, i was hugging my dad from behind, grabbing his hand with my hand tightly and talking him throughout the whole thing....i was near to tears myself....he was making muffled screams from his throat....he looked like he wanted to just bang his head against the wall and just die.....and i hugged him sooo sooooo soooo tight and kept telling him repeatedly and repeatedly and repeatedly that it's gonna be over soon...telling him to be strong..telling him to hang on....

when it was finally over, both my dad are i were in tears....

my dad told my mom much later that if i had not been there to hold on to him, he would have given up.....so even though i wish that my dad didn't have to go thru that at all, i was at least glad that my presence added so much value to him and i am grateful that i chose to come back after all...

but of cos, i hope he doesn't need to go thru this kind of pain again....

From -40 to 30 degree celcius....

2009-04-10T14:58:00.003-07:00

Finally, I'm back in spore...after flying for what feels like ages (drive 2 hrs from Fort st John to Grande Prairie Airport / fly from Grande Prairie to Edmonton / Edmonton to Vancouver / Vancouver to HK and finally HK to Singapore....oh boy..am i exhausted...

But finally, i am back on Singapore La La Land.....too bad, michelle is away at Vancouver now....Never told anyone in Spore exactly which date and flight i am flying in.....didn't want friends to come fetch me at the airport so decided to just keep mum about the exact date and time...lol...

anyway, the minute i landed in singapore, i got so sick....it was sooo weird cos even though the flight was long and tiring, but i actually felt pretty good and super hydrated during the whole time...and this was the first time (in my whole life) that i didn't get chapped lips and dry skin after a flight...so it really surprised me that i got so sick the minute i landed....dun tell me it's a sign??? LOL...hahaa

anyway, it's now my 2nd day and i am still not feeling too well....though i already promised my good fren to go ktv with her this morning....i think maybe i shd go but not sing too much...i haven't felt this sick for ages....

so the first thing i had for breakfast from spore is wanton soup and economical mee/beehoon.....sooooo yummy and super cheap.....dun think there is any food that is so good and cheap at FSJ...lol....I even took a pic of my beehoon....hahhaa...so i can have a picture folder named "All My Spore Fav Foods" in facebook....^_^

But yes, i am starting to miss hubby, jazz and stewie...i have always liked dogs but i admit that i have never been the ardent dog lover & I have never really wanted to live in a home with dogs....i just like to play with them but not take care of them so it really freak me out a little when i first arrived at Canada and had to live with Jazz & Stewie...but having lived with them for 7 mths, I now cannot imagine not living w/o them.....one other reason why i have never wanted a dog is because i could never see myself having a dog and a baby (when i have one) living under the same roof...cos i think it be too dirty for the baby & etc.....and i feel that it's very unfair when one decides to give up their dogs when their baby arrives....so since i never want to see myself making such a decision, i decide not to have dogs at all, to begin with...

But having lived with 2 big dogs for 7 mths, i realised that babies and dogs can live together....and in fact, i now think it's a great thing for my dogs to live with my baby (ermmm, in the future la)....If i didn't have Jazz & Stewie for the last 7 mths, life in Canada might not have been that rosy for me to adapt to.....when i cried, jazz and stewie was always there for me...Jazz would put her head on my lap and look at me with adoring eyes.....and Stewie, although pretty goofy would stop playing and just sit in front of me looking at me.....Since I dun know when, Jazz & Stewie has stopped being just my dogs.....Corny as it sounds, I see us as a 4 member family unit now.....Me, Hubby and our 2 dogs....we are a small, rowdy, happy and crazy family...

although I have no doubt that Jazz and stewie must be pretty happy that they can now sleep on the bed every night with their daddy...now that mummy is gone for 6 weeks...hahaha...

gosh...i sooo miss them....

Is Being Judgemental Really Wrong? I Dun Think So...

2009-03-05T13:35:00.014-07:00

Today, I had a pretty heated up conversation with my colleagues during lunch. Topic was on Nadya Suleman & her 14 babies. They felt that everyone is too judgemental on her for making the choice to have so many babies, even though she had no work, no money and no husband by her side. Even the house she lives in belongs to her parents. And they felt that people had no right to take her kids away from her and put them into foster care. There are 2 areas in this topic that i want to talk abt...

Firstly, if you look at the defination of "Judgemental" according to http://www.thefreedictionary.com, it means the following:

1. Of, relating to, or dependent on judgment: a judgmental error.
2. Inclined to make judgments, especially moral or personal ones:

First of all, we would be lying to ourselves if we told ourselves that we are never judgemental. As a matter of fact, we all are....whether you like to believe or not, we go through our lives every day being judgemental. The term "judgemental" has always had a negative connotation to it but the fact is every single day, we make both negative and positive judgements about things, about events, about people. My colleagues think i am being judgemental when i tell them about the negativity that I feel towards Nadya Suleman but likewise, they are being judgemental when they tell me that they think people shd leave her alone and the fact that she has 14 babies under this situation doesn't mean she is a bad person and that she could be a good parent. The truth is we all make judgements (positive & negative) in our everyday life, based on our values, our exposure to life, our experiences and the way that we were brought up in. And why is it that negative judgement has to be always bad? Can you truly tell yourself that everytime you make a positive judgement about someone, you are being entirely true to yourself? Dun get me wrong. I think it's good to think positive but i think we are all entitled to make judgements (be it positive or negative). And thinking that being judgemental is a very bad trait and shd be avoided at all courses is just self-delusional...

I remembered this passage a long time ago in another blog and i found that passage very meaningful...well, at least to me....

"No-one has a problem when positive judgements are made, yet when fault is openly found with people, service, choices etc. this is perceived as negative. This seems a touch hypocritical – Surely we are obliged to assess people and situations in the context of our own requirement?"

Secondly, my colleagues feels that it's not the right thing to take the 8 kids away from their mom and place them into other families' homes & that a judge has no right to make that kind of decision based on his opinion that this would be the best for everyone. What makes the judge so sure that the 8 children will be happier with other families, instead of with their own mom?

I agree that no one, including a judge can ensure 100% that his decision will definitely be the best for the kids. After all, he's only a human being like us...ermmm, except he earns a lot more than us...lol...

This world, this society is already pretty screwed up at times....if we had no judges, no processes for the judges, the social workers, the police & etc, to make a decision based on a logical, regulated, legislated, rational, possibly unfeeling & systematic process, this world would be in total chaos. So even though the judge might make a decision that ends up being a mistake for the 8 kids involved, but u know what....life could be a whole lot worse if these systems governing the judges, the police, the social workers are not in place.....sure, my sympathies are with the 8 kids but whether they are separated from their mom or whether they stay together, my sympathies are still with them....because no matter what happens, it's still going to be a challenging & tough road ahead for them...

Yes. Systems, legislations & rules that allows judges to make decisions on our lives might be cold unfeeling & wrong at times but these are the fundamentals required to make the world function in a efficient manner. We dun like them because it impose on us a force to behave in ways that we dun want to...but at the same time, we cannot deny that we do need these systems and enforcements.

To anyone who read my blog, do leave a comment on how you feel abt this blog entry...I would love to hear your opinion.....anyway, i dun think there must be a definite right or wrong in what we think.....it's only when we agree to disagree that we can learn and grow continuously and isn't learning supposed to be a lifelong journey? ^_^

12 Things You Dun Know About Me

2009-02-24T19:30:00.004-07:00

1. Doing presentations in front of people thrills, excites & gives me an intense adrenaline rush...although hours before the presentation, I am always an intense WRECK....

2. I always forget to drink water and have gone thru 3 days with drinking only 1 sip of water.

3. I always watch the first few and last few episodes of any drama & if i dun like the ending, i dun watch the show & fast fwd button is a great tool

4. I enjoy healthy flirting. I think it's good for health & everyone, married or single should do it & not take it too seriously.

5. Racist people makes me SUPER MAD

6. I daydream A LOT...and my daydreaming are very exact and detailed....if i daydream abt winning the lottery, i will daydream abt how much tax is gonna be deducted from the winnings to daydreaming abt the misery @ the huge tax deducted, to daydreaming abt the EXACT and DETAILED ways to spend the winnings to daydreaming abt what kind of old lady i will be when i am 80 with so much money still....LOL....

7. I love playing brainless and retarded cooking games online...the more retarded it is, the better...for e.g, the step by step process to cook a pancake ^)^...hahaha

8. If I lose the last 10 pounds, i will do Boudoir Photography of myself, without the face...so if it's ugly, i can say it's someone else....lol

9. I AM VERY VERY VERY BAD WITH NUMBERS.....

10. I cannot tell which is North, South , East, West

11. Though i am not stupid, i have limited common sense

12. I have very ugly feet & legs...

Wonderful Experience @ The Keg Restaurant

2009-02-22T17:05:00.005-07:00

Well, the 2 hours' drive all the way to Grande Prairie & the waiting of at least 40 mins for a table @ The Keg Steakhouse & Bar certainly was worth it.....while we were waiting for our table, we were served complimentary red wine ^_^...that certainly makes the waiting all the sweeter......and of cos, the anticipation that it would be a wonderful dining experience helps too....

The vibe & atmosphere of the restaurant was good, hippy and yet classy....the server assigned to our table was really nice and at the end, hubby made sure he communicated to the Manager of the excellent service we have received from the server....because her service really did help make the dining experience a very nice one...^_^.....and although we had to wait for a table and our main courses took some time to arrive, we did not feel letdown at all...cos the atmosphere was sooo nice that we were just taking our leisure chatting.....so when the manager came & told us (shortly after we were served our main courses) that they felt bad that they kept us waiting so long for the main courses that the 2 appetizers that we ordered would be complimentary, I was really pleasantly surprised...^_^....well, enough of the gushing.....time to review what we ate and the quality of it...^_^

We ordered a bottle of 2005 Zinfandel from the Caymus Vineyards...i never really know how to appreciate wine, despite many friends attempting to convert me to becoming a wine appreciator...and honestly, i still dun think i will be a big wine appreciator anytime soon but still, i was pleasantly surprised when i actually find myself enjoying the wine yesterday.....hahha, though i probably only drank 5 gulps of it....LOL...

We ordered 2 appetizers : Baked Goat Cheese & Shrimp Cocktail. I have never been a big fan of goat cheese but this one was really nice with the crusty bread, and the goat cheese was warm & coated in crushed almonds. There was also tomato basil salsa which adds flavor to the taste. As for the Shrimp Cocktail, it was basically Chilled Black Tiger shrimp with a zesty martini cocktail sauce...the shrimps were fresh enough but i won't say that i'm raving over it....

Next is our main course. Being a seafood lover, i ordered the Lobster Tail Dinner which consists of two succulent Atlantic lobster tails, topped with rice pilaf....I absolutely love it....the lobster was super super fresh and sweet...i didn't need the dipping sauce at all....the rice was a mixture of different rice like wild rice, white and brown rice, i think....and the texture of the rice was perfect...hubby ordered a slow roasted prime rib with an oven baked Atlantic lobster tail....i never like steak so can't really comment on that but hubby seems to like it...

How can the nice romantic meal not end with a super delicious dessert right??? So hubby ordered a Port and a Chocolate dessert for 2 to share. I cannot remember the name but i think it's called Chocolate Heavenly and it's indeed heavenly......it consists of 3 kinds of chocolate desserts - a chocolate ice-cream, a chocolately kind of mousse cake and 2 chocolate brownies....initially, i thought it might just be too much chocolate and sometimes when I eat too much sweet chocolate, i get really disgusted but i think because they use good quality dark chocolate, so it was not overly sweet and i like that there was a slight bitter aftertaste to it...

So now u see why the 2 hours' drive was all worth it...^_^

I thereby conclude today tt i am indeed talkative...

2009-02-17T12:42:00.005-07:00

well....i guess, usually, i must be quite a loud and noisy person @ work cos today i was quiet and immediately, a few colleagues noticed it....this is probably a indicator that i am too talkative at times...lol..

but well, i was in a really bluey mood and given the fact that i am such a crybaby, i thought it be better to just shut up for once...cos once i start talking about something emotional, i start tearing and become a huge crybaby!!! Not that i mind being one but just not at work too often.....in case, people watch me like they watching a soapy drama, u know....hahaa..lol^_^

well, what is making me blue is not something entirely new anyway.....it's my daddy...his illness seems to be getting worse and i think the worst thing is that we dun know yet what is affecting him - is it his cancer or his old spinal cord surgery or something else?? He has such a huge and lengthy and extensive records with the hospital that it will take some time to diagnose what is really wrong with him...and i hate the fact that i am not with him.....for the last 5 years, i have always been the one with him, together with my mom.....i know his medications, his doctors, am always the one who questions & argues with the doctors if they give us crap...i was always the one who scolded my dad if he misbehaves...the one who says sweet things to him when he feels terrible..the one who makes most of the decisions in the household...but all of a sudden, i can't do all these roles anymore......because i am not in Singapore anymore....and that irks me A LOT....i hate feeling helpless....i hate not being able to make decisions at the snap of a finger, what is best for him......above all, i hate that i am not there with him....

Bammie's Herbs & Spices Baked Chicken

2009-02-11T16:13:00.009-07:00

today was supposed to be pretty lousy cos the work system was either down or super slow like the tortoise...could hardly get any work done..but at noon time after lunch, we were all notified by the boss that we could all go home for the day since the system was not functioning properly.....hoo hoo...^_^ that is sooooooo nice but definitely a first for me....never had something like that before happening to me but well, if it's all nice things, keep them coming MY WAY!!!! ^_^ lol....

and i thought i will AGAIN try a new recipe today & share with everyone....

Ingredients:

-4 Chicken Thighs

-Green Onions, chopped

-Parsley

-Minced Garlic

-Thai Sweet Chilli Sauce

-Ginger slices (thinly sliced)

-Sesame Oil

-Light Soya Sauce

-Vegetables (Any kind)

Blend everything (except chicken & vege) together till u get a smooth paste. Pre-heat oven at 350 degree F. Placed chicken & vege evenly in a tray lined with aluminium foil. Add and mix the paste in. Bake for 50 mins but do turn the chickens over halfway through. Pretty easy recipe, right?

It's a really super easy recipe...doesn't take a good cook to do that ^_^....Muacks..

Bammie's Toasted Oat Granola Bars

2009-02-11T09:58:00.009-07:00

I got this recipe from Cyndi, my colleague in Penn West....before this, i have always thought that granola bars are difficult to make but it's actually quite an easy recipe...Sure, u might not always get the perfect rectangular looking granola bars you can buy from the stores....but it's homemade & it's super delicious...who cares?? ^_^..You can eat it straight or crush them & top it up with your favourite yogurt....one thing to note is that the original recipe calls for 150 ml sugar but i put in only 70ml sugar cos i feel that all the berries & raisins will give it quite a flavorful taste already...but it's really up to you....ohh, it's important that you dun buy those instant or 2 min ready oats....cos they will end up really mashy...

Ingredients
- 3 cups large flake oats
- 1/2 cup shredded coconut flakes
- 1/2 cup chopped dried apricots
- 1/2 cup raisins
- 1/2 cup dried cranberries
- 1/2 cup sunflower seeds
- 1/2 cup almond flakes
- 150ml butter
- 70 ml sugar
- 1/4 cup honey
- 1/4 cup corn syrup
- 1/2 tsb vanilla essence

1. In a large skillet, toast oats & coconut flakes over medium heat, stirring often for abt 7 mins. Transfer to large bowl and let cool.
2. Stir into the large bowl your apricots, raisins, cranberries, sunflower seeds & almond flakes & give it a good mix.
3. In the same skillet, melt & mix butter, sugar, honey & corn syrup over medium heat. Make sure to stir constantly and not to overboil it. Just boil for abt 2 mins. Remove from heat & add the vanilla essence. Let cool for 1 min.
4. Pre-heat oven to 350 degree F or 180 degree celcius.
5. Now pour the liquid mixture over the oat mixture & stir them to coat.
6. Scrape into parchment paper-lined tray, pressing firmly with back of spoon
7. Bake in oven for 25 mins. Let cool. Cut into bars and store in airtight container.

Bammie's Tapioca Pearl Dessert

2009-02-08T19:33:00.004-07:00

This is a super easy recipe....Ingredients include 1 cup of tapioca pearls, 1 piece of Gula Melaka (Palm Sugar) and coconut milk. As i did not have coconut milk, so i used coconut milk powder instead....but it taste the same to me.

In a saucepan filled with boiling water, cook the tapioca seed till it turns translucent. Now reduce to low heat and add coconut powder and stir till no clumps remain. Lastly, add a piece of the gula melaka and stir till it melts. Scoop it into a glass & garnish with grated coconut flakes if you like. Enjoy...^_^

Bammie's Mutton Soup with Handmade Noodles

2009-02-08T18:26:00.016-07:00

Ingredients for Soup

Stewing lamb (u could also use bones or any tougher cuts of the lamb)

Salt, Light Soya Sauce & Pepper (amt depends on individual)

Cilatro (Very Important Ingredient)

Snow Pea Leaves (U can use other vegetables as well)

2 Star Anises

2 Cloves (丁香)

Ingredients for Handmade Noodles

All Purpose Flour

Cold Water

Salt

1. Place lamb, star anises & cloves in a pot of water on medium fire and boil for at least 2 hrs

2. Meanwhile, in a big mixing bowl, add the flour and create a slight hole in the middle & add the salt. Now add the cold water gradually and use a spoon to start mixing. Now, start kneading the dough with your hands & do it till it doesn't feel that sticky to your hand. Cover with damp cloth for about 2 hrs. When the dough is ready, divide them into smaller doughs, working with one dough at a time, covering the rest with the damp cloth to prevent drying. U could either use a rolling pin to roll them till they very thin. As we have a pasta making machine, so I used the machine instead which is definitely easier.

3. Once soup is ready, season the soup with salt, pepper and soya sauce till your preferred taste.

4. Only add the noodles and snow pea leaves in when you are ready to eat. Cos you do not want to keep the noodles and vegetables in the soup base for too long until it becomes soggy. So only put in when u are ready to eat. Once noodles and vegetables are ready, scoop them and the soup into a bowl and garnish with plenty of chopped cilantro....believe me, i never like cilantro until i use it this way...without the cilantro, the soup will be nothing!! Make sure that u scoop all the noodles and vegetables out of the pot so that when the soup cools down, you can scoop them in smaller containers and freeze a batch of them for future usage..

Bammie's Chinese New Year CornFlake Cookies

2009-01-29T07:14:00.012-07:00

Ingredients
1 Tsp Baking Powder
1 Cup Flour
100g Crushed Cornflakes
110g Softened butter
1 Cup Sugar
1 Egg

Bammie's Chocolate Lava Cake

2009-01-28T20:16:00.012-07:00

Some tips:

-Important to pre-heat oven

-I was using measuring cups & the 1/2 cup says 120ml

-This dessert is not difficult but when u mix the flour in, it's important to get the right consistency...My first batch turned out to be too grainy because i used melted butter, instead of softened butter....so crucial to note that..

-If u want less liquid to be oozing in the middle, place it in oven slightly longer but 10 mins to me is just nice cos it's soft on outside but oozing a lot of chocolate liquid in the middle-the way i want it.....

Baking Frenzy ^_^

2009-01-28T13:05:00.003-07:00

I am totally in a "Baking" Frenzy this week....dun know if Chinese New Year has anything to do with it but every morning, i wake up thinking what i wana bake today...lol..& dun think that i have forgotten abt my weight loss plan orrrr......i remembered it....it's engraved onto my brain...heee....but yes, i admit.....it's really super tempting to gobble up all the desserts that i have baked......so i came up with a GREAT SUPER plan......hahaha..no la...not any major super plan....i just think that food taste even better when they are shared.......so as soon as my desserts are done and cooled, i pack them into batches - 1 batch for Pennwest colleagues, 1 batch for hubby & his workplace & of cos a mini batch for home....that subscribes to my philosophy taht food taste better when shared & of cos, then there is less temptation for me....isn't that great? I make myself & others happy, all at the same time ^_^....but of cos, i will only share if they are tasty.....for your info, i made chocolate lave cake on Monday evening & Chinese New Year Cornflake Cookies on Tuesday evening......and i still dun know what i would like to bake tonight..hee, too many choices.....but for sure, i will post the 2 detailed recipes on my blog tonight....Muacks...^_^

Snowboarding & Me = Highly Incompatible ^_^

2009-01-11T14:52:00.007-07:00

9 years ago, i tried skiing when i was traveling in Melbourne at Mt Buller....and i absolutely hated the sport.....so when Kim, my colleague invited me to go snowboarding with her yesterday at Whispering Pines, I hesitated....but at the end, i decided to go....i was thinking maybe this time round after a long 9 years, i will be more physically agile...^_^LOL....

but after trying my hand at snowboarding, i can now conclude without a doubt that I suck at winter sports!!! hahaa....i didn't regret going though....if i didn't go, there will always be a nagging thought at the back of my head telling me to go.....so i'm glad i tried it and it's just too bad that i dun like it at all.....lol....

the next thing i want to try is dog sledging....but i wonder if that requires any skills from me..i hope not......lol..

Me & my spoilt Laptop

2008-12-29T00:45:00.001-07:00

Sighhh……sooo xian….my laptop is still sitting at home and not being repaired yet…AS it’s the holiday seasons here, the computer shop that we are supposed to send our laptop for repair is still not opened yet….it’s Monday today…hopefully, they will be opened today…i have got so much things that i wanted to accomplish on my laptop this long week where i dun have to go to work… I want to start working on Mel & Mark’s wedding montage….I want to start working on my gift to Mom & Dad and I want it to reach them in Singapore before end January, which is Chinese New Year and I have got to start shopping online for a nice Chinese New Year hamper for them….so I gonna have to sweet talk hubby and make sure that we get the laptop to the repair guy by today!!!

I finally received my Wii Fit…..but still waiting for the Wii Console cos it is out of stock here….can’t wait to try it….it looks super fun..& I believe it will help me in my weight…cos I have already started exercising at home…not a whole lot…I try to make sure I do 30mins of cardio or strength training at least thrice a week…so having the Wii will help me to incorporate more variety in my workout……and besides, it’s too freaking cold to go outside….i miss my sandy beaches at sentosa!!!

Halloween 2008 Party

2008-11-02T12:12:00.007-07:00

The party that i have been so looking forward to....i know that there are halloween parties in singapore as well but i think the feeling is definitely much different since it's more clubbing in sg for halloween than anything else...but here, the halloween atmosphere is really all nice.....hahah or should i say eerie?? ^_^

There is the "Trick or Treat" where kids dressed up in halloween costumes will just walk from house to house asking for treats......that is soooo cute and fun....

unfortunately this year, i wasn't in time to get candies for the kids...so hubby had to open the door & say "happy halloween but sorry kids, we got no candies"..lol..but still, it was fun watching the kids all dressed up.....it's such a nice tradition....

& i got 2 pumpkins this year for free from the Pumpkin Man (have no clue who he is at all but hey, he gives us pumpkins for free, u know).....hahaha....and by the time i got home, it was too late to do any pumpkin carving but i told hubby that next year, we must definitely carve our pumpkin and prepare candies for the kids...i mean, it's just an awesome atmospehere!!

I love my neighbour, Tracey's house....it looks spooky......^_^ she said that she & hubby are going to the same party as we are going to in the night....hahha, i probably would not be able to recognise her anyway cos she is going to be dressed as a ghost bride!!

ME??? I'm gonna dress up as a sexy nurse to give the world a healing touch.....heee...i love my nurse costume...comes complete with the nurse hat and stethoscope....what more can a patient ask for??? lol..

The party starts at 7pm but people start to really come in at about 9 pm plus....that's probably the time when the FUN starts anyway...

hubby's colleagues and their wives were there too so it was really nice to see all of them in costumes...I could not even tell it was Chris when he said hi to us....lol...^_^ but i bet every one can tell who i am cos I AM THE ONLY CHINESE there!!!!! lol.....not that it bothers me at all....i still had a lot of fun...

hubby was soo funny....i asked him what he is going to be dressed as and he exclaimed that he's gonna be "HIMSELF"!!!......hahaa...ya, how interesting right???

my costume cost me a bomb though....next year, i will order online...Heather (hubby's colleague's wife) told me that a great website to order from is www.buycostumes.com ....i have checked out the website...it's really a lot of interesting stuff to buy so i'm already all thinking about what to wear next year!!! hahaha....so guys, what do u think??? Could I interview for a nurse job now??? LOL>..

Woo Hoo...My Attempt @ 韭菜盒子 without Mel being around....

2008-10-13T17:37:00.005-07:00

oh boy....ever since i managed to buy some 韭菜 (Chives) at 大統華 Supermarket at Edmonton, I have been dying to use that to make 韭菜盒子(Chives Box) that Mel taught me....But after i got the chives, i could not find any minced pork in the supermarket..there's all kinds of pork but just not minced pork....by the time i found minced pork, i was hesistant to do it cos the last 2 times i did it in singapore without mel by my side, it was not that successful.....the most challenging part was making of the dough.....which i never succeeded 100% in making...

But i am glad to say,especially to Mel who taught me how to do it....Finally, Finally!!! It's a complete success....Instead of following the recipe word by word, i decided to follow my instincts this time....i didn't gauge how much flour or ingredients that i used....Instead, i just followed my instincts and how the dough felt on my hand when i was doing it...and Ta Da!!! It's finally a success...

Since hubby was away at work, i decided to freeze them and when he's back tomorrow, it be a suprise for him......^_^

ta da!! i made croissants....

2008-10-06T11:41:00.004-07:00

haven't blogged for what feels a long time and as usual, i am happy to blog about food cos i am a food lover!!! i have been back from Winnipeg for a while and though it wasn't a long trip, it was a happy one filled with fun and endless of activities...^_^

I am still sorting my photos so more on Winnipeg later.....but this morning, I am one happy woman...I made croissants!!! hmmmm, though it's made from "Pillsbury Ready Made Croissant Flour"....that's one thing i love about canada....though i am 100% sure that's not why my hubby would want me to fall in love with ...but i love the fact that for everything i want to make, there is always a ready made one on the supermarket shelf smiling back at me.....if i want to make pizza, there's tons of crust brand to choose from and the crust is soooo thin that it doesn't feel any different from the good ones i eat at restaurants....and when i feel like making a berry pie, i can just pop out and get a ready made crispy crust....isn't that nice??? lol

of cos, nothing beats the dough that my hubby made from scratch but hey, we can't always rely on a man right??? he's afterall not superman, u know.....heeee

anyway, it was really easy to make the croissants and now i have 4 freshly baked croissants in front of me...yummy..

My Oyakodon Recipe

2008-09-10T13:58:00.005-07:00

For those of you who are not sure what a Oyakodon is, it is actually a Japanese Chicken & Egg Rice Bowl...

actually, i didn't set out on purpose to do this dish..it's just that for the last few days, i have been so damn inspired by the way hubby cooks that when i was cracking my brains of what to make for lunch when it suddenly occured to me that we had some leftover sushi rice in the fridge....so decided to make Oyakodon cos i liked to eat that back in spore too....

decided not to search for recipes online and just to rely on my imagination.....wa la!!! the finished product was quite tasty, u know...lol

In a big saucepan, heat some oil & saute the sliced onions & fresh mushrooms (i used fresh mushrooms instead of chicken cos chicken too troublesome for me)......once it's fragrant, add some water & light soya sauce....no need to put a lot of liquid cos u want the ingredients to be sauted & not to be boiled, u know......once the liquid starts to dry up a bit, drizzle 1 beaten egg over it slowly and try to place all the ingredients together in the middle of the pan.......once the egg is ready (u dun want the egg to be too dry...preferably a little bit of wetness), pour the whole thing over the bowl of plain sushi rice....ta da!!! here u r.....my Oyakodon ^_^

My 1st Week in Canada

2008-09-09T07:12:00.005-07:00

hi guys,
thanks for all the care & concern & love....I have been in Canada for almost 4 days and so far, i am happy to report that things are going well SO FAR.......haha.....

Of cos, there's a lot of things that i am unused to.... the fact that i dun see a single chinese or asian in my region, living & sleeping with Jazz & Stewy (his 2 big dogs) & their dog hair, studying for my upcoming driving theory test, zero shopping activity & etc...

but i will get used to it...& jeff said that although the dogs like me too, but i have to be more firm and aggressive with them so they know that i am the boss!!!

have taken some photos from my SLR but haven't figured on how to download the photos.....so bear with me...^_^

2 more days before I fly...

2008-09-03T11:04:00.006-07:00

it's 2 days away....i'm starting to feel real sad.... it's so sad that i cannot sleep at night....these few days, i always dread night time cos i start to feel like crying when all is silent....

i am bringing my parents to dim sum again tomorrow....it will be a long time before i can do these kind of simple things for them again....it makes me regret why i dun do enough on a daily basis...but at the same time, i also know that no matter how much i have done in the past, i will still feel the same way i feel now....it's really corny....but i'm crying like a baby while i am writing these.....i'm forever afraid of how they will cope without me....maybe it's really me afraid of how i will cope without them...i also dun know..

sometimes, i cannot believe how filial i really am....cos i dun fit into the typical profile of a filial daughter...i dun like to shop with mom and keep her company....i snap at them & i dun often display enough patience with them... i take them for granted....& many other things...

but now that i am leaving for Canada to start my new life with Jeff, i realised fully and finally can conclude to myself that Yes, I am indeed a very filial daughter....i just wish i had more time to show them how much i love them....

Farewell Dinner w Ex-Tms Gang

2008-09-02T22:38:00.004-07:00

allow me to introduce Lu Lu to all of you......doesn't she look a teenie weenie like me?? hahaaa...i think she looks like the "me" during my wedding actually, when i still had long curly hair and was slightly slimmer then (ermmm, 5 kg slimmer)....but now, she looks prettier than me....but, i will aim to lose that damn 5kg or I will not have the guts to come back to spore to meet all my friends...sobsob....

Thanks Sher for taking 2-3 hrs to make Lu Lu for me...I really like it and rest assured that she will occupy a nice cosy spot at my hom in Fort St John.....

& Thanks to all the other girls for organising yesterday farewell dinner for me...I was very touched....^_^ for more photos of Lulu, check out my facebook ^)^

Great Dinner..Great Plates Smashing....Great Friends...Great Live Band...What else Can I ask for??^_^

2008-08-23T23:31:00.014-07:00

it's one of those rare nights that i allow myself to be dragged into a pub by friends....it's not that i dislike being in a pub.....to tell u the truth, i am just plain lazy^_^....besides, i dun drink a lot...so i'm thinking to myself "ermmm, what's the point in going?" but everytime i allow myself to be dragged there, i always find myself having a good time & really enjoying myself to the fullest....u see, people need to drink a lot to get high & intoxicated....I dun need that...I am a "self-high" person.....hahaa, not too sure if there's even such a word called "self-high"...but what i meant was that i dun need alcohol to make me high...give me good music & great friends & I will get high easily ^_^..so when i started kissing mel, jiang li and mark (on the cheek la...^_^), they must have thought i was drunk.....but but but how can i get drunk when i have only had one drink...lol...& honestly, the drink had more coke than alcohol.....^_^

but we had a really smashing time & as usual, the lead singer in the band is forever soo entertaining...

before we went to Harrys, Mark & Mel bought me dinner @ Esmirada, Orchard Hotel....it's a restaurant that serves Mediterranean cuisine...we ordered a Grill Platter for 2 & Swordfish skewer & their signature tall & standing garlic bread.....the food portions were big & hearty & full of flavor.....Mark & I shared the grilled platter which had grilled beef tenderloins, lamb chops, huge prawns & etc...it was very good, especially the prawns & beef....beef was tender and nicely flavored...prawn was very big and fresh.....u dun need any sauce to go with it but because their salsa sauce was sooo yummy...i had to have some....the lamb chop was tender but because i am not a fan of lamb meat so i cannot be a good judge.....i dun like the swordfish though...it was a tad too fishy for my likes but do remember to order the garlic bread when you are there...it's really very nice & the bread was very crispy......halfway through our meal, i started hearing plates being smashed on the floor...at first, i thought it was a careless waiter but before i knew it, all the waiters were smashing & throwing plates on the floor...& they even passed all the guests plates to smash as well..i didn't get to smash one but Mark did...& boy, it was rowdy, noisy, scary & fun....lol...& guests were standing on the table dancing while everyone was smashing plates on the floor......scary!!! but the atmosphere was really great!

on the whole, i would highly recommend this restaurant for anyone who wants to have a smashing good time....& i will definitely visit this restaurant again...& oh yes, i heard their tiramisu is to die for....next time must go try...^_^

Thanks, Mark & Mel for the great night & the great dinner...^_^

Singapore Fireworks Celebration 2008

2008-08-22T10:27:00.005-07:00

damn exciting evening.....have wanted to be in the audience seat @ the Marina Bay Floating Platform ever since they started using it for National Day Parade last year but since it's soo difficult to get the parade tickets, it's been an impossible task so far so am really thrilled to get tickets to go watch the Singapore Fireworks Celebration 2008 this year before I fly to Canada....god knows when i can fly back...

anyway, tonight's display of fireworks are by 2 teams & they are from France and Korea...even though it was a short display after the long waiting time, but it was definitely worth the wait ^_^
for more photos of the fireworks, check out my facebook photos...but i have to say that taking pictures of fireworks is too challenging for my photography level......so the pics are not that nice & awesome and it certainly doesn't do the actual display justice....

Fake Eyelashes

2008-08-20T10:59:00.007-07:00

another thing that i have been rather obsessed with lately.......& that is putting on fake eyelashes...

Ever since my sister taught me how to put these falsies, i have been soooo obsessed that i have bought a total of 8 pairs of fakelashes (from Bugis, Sasa & Faceshop) and i am bringing all 8 pairs to Canada.....my family thinks i am crazy to bring soo many but it's such a thrill putting them on...lol...

the first time i went out of the house with my fake eyelashes, i used a total of 1.5 hrs to put them on......but i am improving...now, i take about 30 mins to wear them...i know it's really vain but then again, I am a woman ah and all women have the right to be vain....lol...^_^

the following 2 pictures are of me trying with different eyelash styles...the first one is for a glam night out where you want to be more dramatic.....but u need a heavier eye makeup to compliment that dramatic fake eyelashes....the 2nd picture is a more natural looking fake eyelashes where you can go from day to night.....i like the 2nd one better and will be using that most of the time....the dramatic one, i think is too much for me, even for a hot night out with the girls......

Latte Art ^_^

2008-08-20T10:36:00.009-07:00

My Failed Attempts & My Ok Attempts...

Been thinking of learning how to make good coffee for the longest time.....goes way back to end last year when i saw a cup of coffee with a "SMILE" served at a Mcdonalds Cafe at Plaza Singapura......Since then, i have made a conscious effort to observe what goes on behind a coffee bar & the way that people makes coffee...but what is observing without the actual trying, right?

Decided to enrol myself for expresso class level 1...In this class, we were introduced to coffee from seed to roasting, the ABCs of the espresso machine, the coffee grinder, how to extract a perfect espresso basics, art and science of steaming and foaming milk, the making of espresso based drinks variations, latte art & maintainance of your expresso machine...

it was all good fun....and initially, the big expresso machines does look quite intimidating...but i'm sure all of us had a lot of fun....we also got the chance to practice what we learned and believe me....it's quite challenging....

TA DA!!!!! Introducing to You my "Cake In a Cup"

2008-08-14T09:39:00.007-07:00

Just found something way COOL at Daiso today when i was shopping with my family...sighhh, that chance will not come often in the future......sighh...okie, not to digress...I will just treasure the remaining time spent with my family....think that shd be most important..

anyway, back to the item i discovered in daiso....It's a "Cake In a Cup"....they come in different flavors such as coffee, vanilla, caramel & etc....I bought the caramel one and it's sooo simple that an idiot can do it ....what u do is that you add an egg into a mug (the usual one U used to make your coffee) and beat the egg for 1 min....then u add the packet of flour mixture into the mug and stir in the same direction till egg & flour are mixed well and the mixture is creamy and has no lumps...it's faster than i thought....i timed myself and it took less than 1 min for it to turn creamy & smooth...Then you microwave it with the mug for 2 minutes...TA DA DA DA!!!! & here comes your spongy and nice and yummy sponge cake...we just eat it straight from the mug...Way Cool....Man, I love Daiso..

I heard there's a HUGE Daiso in Vancouver.....think i will go crazy if i go there...lol

Food @ Tiong Bahru Food Centre

2008-08-09T22:57:00.016-07:00

Ta da!! Today is a food hunt along Tiong Bahru Food Market with my mom....& here's our reviews...

LOCATION: Tiong Bahru Food Centre
30, Seng Poh Road

Koh Brothers Pig Organ Soup

Having been dragged out of the house by me on a Sunday morning, my mom was delighted when she saw this dish being sold at the Koh Brother Stall (pls refer to above picture). This is a dish of glutinous rice roll with chestnuts stuffed in pork intestine caul. What sounds gross to me is delightful to my mom so we bought a packet of it. I have never been a fan of any form of intestines....but my mom loves them and i think it reminds her of grandma cos she said grandma used to make them by hand...besides, this is a dish that is very difficult to find in Singapore these days...but at the first bite, my mom was disappointed.....my mom felt that the glutinuous rice was too plain and was not fragrant at all....so in a nutshell, my mom gave the thumbs-down..

Tiong Bahru Lor Mee vs 178 Shark Meat Lor Mee

There have been countless comparisions between the Lor Mee (a Chinese noodle dish using thick yellow noodles & served in a thick gravy) sold from both stalls at the Tiong Bahru Food Centre so today, I decided to test both together

The lor mee at "Tiong Bahru Lor Mee" is less starchy and has a more traditional taste to it.....the ingredients were very crispy and fresh and includes ngor hiang, fish nuggets, fish cakes, braised meat, braised egg, fried fish and fried dumplings....though the gravy is more watery than 178 stall, the gravy is still very thick, smooth & delicious...

Well, this 178 Lor Mee usually has the longest queue among the Lor Mee stalls in Tiong Bahru Food Centre and it has many many reviews pasted on their stall so how could I possibly miss it??? WEll, the Lor Mee is very tasty indeed...& they are famous for the Fried Shark Meat Nuggets, which thought was very well seasoned and tasty....Let me recall....there are braised meat, fish cake, fried meat fritters & the fried shark meat nuggets....the ingredients are very very cripsy so it goes really well with the starchy gravy....

Conclusion: We liked both Lor Mee but if we had to choose one, we would go for the traditional "Tiong Bahru Lor Mee"....Even though 178 Lor Mee is very tasty too and seems to have more customers, but Tiong Bahru Lor Mee has a traditional yummy taste that makes me want to go back for more......

Food @ Bedok Interchange Food Centre

2008-08-09T07:35:00.015-07:00

yummilicious....people always said there's a lot of nice yummy food at Bedok Interchange...but since I dun go to Bedok often, i hardly have the chance to taste the yummy food there..

today, i decided to buy back dinner for my mom & dad...so I bought Soon Kueh from "Fatt Soon Kueh", Chwee Kueh from "Bedok Chwee Kueh" & the fried hokkien mee from "Bedok Central Hokkien Mee"....Can't recall the full name of the Hokkien Mee stall but you cannot miss it...it's very near to the toliet and if you guys have watched "抢摊大行动", the episode on 忠记加东叻沙, the hokkien mee stall is just next to the infamous laksa stall....The laksa stall uncle is really quite mean leh ( for those of you who has watched the last episode of "抢摊大行动", you will know what i mean)...I mean...u wrote to the tv station and begged them to help you revive your business and when you have succeeded, you give a stupid attitude..Anyway, Singaporeans aren't dumb lo....if you refuse to be positive and make better laksa, customers will go away eventually...& especially since that uncle was sooo mean to the tv crew on national tv...anyway, it would seem that he didn't have that much business just now when i was there...and my hokkien mee stall is bustling with customers....

well, back to my food reviews:

Soon Kueh from "Fatt Soon Kueh"

honestly, i didn't think the Soon kueh was that great, despite hearing many good reviews about it...my parents also didn't think it was that tasty...the skin was too thick and the fillings were very little and the taste wasn't that nice and seasoned...so guess, i have to hunt around my little island for better soon kueh cos my dad recently developed a craving for soon kueh...lol

Chwee Kueh from "Bedok Chwee Kueh"

Man....I love the Chwee Kueh (it's a kind of steamed rice cake, served hot & topped with diced preserved radish & is a popular breakfast item in Singapore) ....it didn't fail me at all though my mom thought it was a tad too sweet for her liking...she prefers the Chwee Kueh from Ghim Moh Market...lol...well, to each his own...but i like the Bedok Chwee Kueh because the rice cake is very smooth, soft but yet light in their texture and the diced radish (we call them "Chye Poh) is fried nicely with a sweet and salty taste...yummy!

Fried Hokkien Mee from "Bedok Central Hokkien Mee"
hmmm, sorry....the noodles was quite delicious that i forgot to take a picture of it.....but just remember that it's the stall that is nearest to the toliet...

My dad is quite picky about hokkien mee but he likes it...so does my mom & me....Unlike the one sold in Ghim Moh, the wetness of the dish is just nice..it's not too dry and yet not too wet....the prawns & squids are very fresh....service by the people in the stall are good, even though they were very busy....hmmmm, now my whole family is sooooooo satisfied.....heee, a durian now would certainly end out meal nicely....lol....

Happy Birthday to my Singapore!^_^

2008-08-09T06:56:00.003-07:00

Today is a big day in Singapore...It is Singapore National day...We are 43 years old! Though I'm also a Canadian PR now, I will always be a true blue Singaporean in my heart and i'm really glad that I could be at home watching the National Day celebrations with my mom & dad...it's damn tough to get the tickets to the parade...sighh...

fortunately, i have had the chance to join the National day Parade as a performer with the PAP Association.....that was way back when i was still in secondary school...it is really touching when we sang Singapore songs together in such a huge group, in such a huge setting...

but i would really love to be in the audience seat watching it.....

It's really cool.....& who says we are too small a country to achieve big things....We are hosting Formula One first ever night race in the history of Formula One. Mark 28 September 2008 down on your calender. Apart from being the first night race, it is only the second F1 race - apart from Monaco - to feature a full 5.067 km street circuit. Way Cool...Singapore ROCKS!!!

Besides that, we beat Moscow to win the bid to host the Youth Olympics which is happening in 2010....I hope I be in SG at that time..it be a real exciting moment for all Singaporeans...

& no matter where in the world I may be at, I will always be proud to tell people that I am a Singaporean.....Go Roar Singapore! Singapore ROCKS!!!!

SMILE & the world becomes prettier...^_^

2008-08-04T07:37:00.003-07:00

this pic was taken at a Macdonald cafe ages ago when i was there to meet a friend...I happened to feel blue on that day & the minute I saw the coffee that my friend was having, it brought a smile to my face....so i took a pic of it but was unable to retrieve it from my cellphone....FINally, today i got the photo out so here goes....Hope it cheers you up too....^_^

babes in the city...

2008-08-04T06:48:00.004-07:00

wow...i haven't been to Raffles Place for the longest time and it surprise me the extreme lengths that firms go all out to advertise their brand...

if i saw correctly, there was a promotion by Nokia this afternoon at Raffles Place , outside OUB Centre..i didn't stop there long enough to figure out the details of the promotion but what stopped me while i was walking was a pretty and sexy model wearing only a bikini lounging in the middle of our Central Business District!! ^_^...& despite the sunny weather, i'm sure all men, young & old had a cool time watching the babe in her sexy outfit..lol..

My Tiramisu had great reviews...^_^

2008-08-03T10:05:00.005-07:00

for the longest time, i have wanted to make tiramisu.....i love the fact that i dun have to use a oven to make tiramisu...and i love the meaning of "Tiramisu"...The name "Tiramisu" is Italian and it means "pick me up" but can be translated more directly as "make me happy". So it's a dessert that makes us happy...what more can a woman ask for^_^??? Besides, it is super delicious..

But contrary to what i had thought or what people around me had informed me, tiramisu is harder to make than i thought...No doubt, everyone can make tiramisu...but to make it presentable & not look like a gooey mess is the key to eventual success!!!...but I also haven't figured that out yet....hahaaa....but well, look at it this way...If I can figure that out easily, pastry chefs will all lose their jobs, u know.....heeee...^_^

anyway, it's really easy...and I got the recipe from http://www.visualrecipes.com/ ...just search for tiramisu if you want to follow their recipe cos mine wasn't exactly the same...

Ingredients:
5 Eggs
6 Tbsp Fine Sugar
Dark Chocolate Bar
500g mascarpone cheese
A full cup of black coffee with no sugar (set aside on a plate and let it cool before usage)
2 Pkts of Sponge Fingers
A Round Pan

Directions:
1. Separate the egg whites and the egg yolks in 2 mixing bowls
2. Place 5 tbsp sugar into the egg yolk bowl & beat till creamy
3. Stir in all the mascarpone cheese & beat it gently under low speed
4. Once that's done, I place it in the fridge first while i do other stuff
5. Now beat the bowl with the egg white till it's fluffy
6. Once that's done, manually mix the egg white mixture with the mascarpone cheese mixture gently
7. Now u can start dipping the sponger fingers into the coffee before placing them onto the round pan..note that u shouldn't let the sponge fingers stay in the coffee for too long....2-3 seconds is more than enough...
8. Once you finish placing the first layer of sponge fingers (with no gaps), add the cheese mixture until the surface is all covered... Repeat the 2 steps (another layer of sponge fingers & cheese). Now the whole cake stays overnight in the fridge.
9. Instead of using cocoa powder, i decided to use actual dark chocolate.....feels more luxurious...^_^..this step is simple...just grate the chocolate on top of the cake and put as much as you like... & TA DA!!!! MY tiramisu is now ready to be served..

As i was bringing it to a BBQ, so it melted a little ....but if u keep it in the fridge till the very last minute, think it will look even better....^_^...

and reviews were good....my friends and family both liked it and there were people asking for 2nd servings ok??? dun play play leh....haaaa..^_^ I can't wait to make it for hubby...

Off We Go to the 2008 Singapore Garden Festival....

2008-07-27T00:53:00.015-07:00

it only happens once every 2 years so we are always very keen to go on the very first day....for those of you who are not aware, i'm taking about the Singapore Garden festival happening in Suntec City right now....

The exhibition showcase creations from the world’s top award-winning garden and floral designers and is a blast....well, at least for me...and i was happy to see that they retail bitter gourd seeds there so i bought a packet...am gonna bring it to Canada and ask hubby to grow it in our garden...wonder if it will grow to be edible cos i think it's hard to find bitter gourds in Canada so am hoping to grow my own cos I LOVE STIR FRIED BITTER GOURDS

hey lise & diane.....have u seen this kind of vegetable being sold in Canada before??? anyway, back to the garden fest, i loved all the exhibits this year but my favorite exhibit this year is a fantasy garden created by a S'porean, called "Seeking Shangri-La". It features the Himalayan peaks submerged in rising oceans and is a reminder to global warming and its consequences..the exhibit shows us an imagined time & place where Shangri-la lies submerged under collapsed glaciers & in sad and eternal ruins...

As per the 2006 Garden festival, there was a section that was entirely devoted to orchids from all over the world.....

well, we had a most enjoyable time and if you like flowers like we do, do pay a visit to the festival...

@ Bistro GaGa today...

2008-07-06T07:25:00.007-07:00

Am very happy today ^_^.. though I had to do quite a lot of work at home yesterday & today but since I finished my presentation draft in time, decided to meet my friend for a nice cosy meal...after much deliberation (ermmm, between Bistro GaGa & Giraffe), we chose Bistro Gaga at the end because there seem to be many negative reviews about Giraffe @ Plaza Sing... well, i dun know abt my friend....but i sure didn't regret my choice ^_^....Other than telling you that it's "YUMMY", my only other comment is still "YUMMY!"...lol..

I ordered the Wagyu beef burger....beef was very nice and tender.....i usually dread eating beef in Singapore cos it always disappoint me...but I love the beef here....Lee Leng had the seafood aglio olio that I had the other time..I hope she liked it...though i didn't really think it was the best Seafood Aglio Olio that I have had....We had complimentary dessert...can't remember the name but it was nice too..I tried to bear with it but could not resist ordering their Chocolate Fondant which ends our meal nicely..

Of cos, the companionship was great too!! Was so happy to catch up with Lee Leng after such a long time...she belongs to the group of friends that I never meet up often (not my fault...just that we got different groups of friends).....but once we meet up, there's never a lack of topic and chemistry...lol...anyway, she's getting married next year...so happy & excited for her....^_^

busy but boring weekend

2008-07-05T00:32:00.002-07:00

hmm...was supposed to be making tiramisu tonight but am still busy doing my 18 July presentation so decided to keep this weekend free and not go out....

but alas, I have ZERO inspiration!!!..all i want & feel like doing is laze at home for the whole day...looks like this is not possible now....what a boring Sat...

To send or not to send?

2008-06-30T08:39:00.003-07:00

I shd be heading for slumberland since i'm pretty tired after all the hoo ha of today...

but dad appears rather unwell now and his temperature rise & fall like a rollercoaster ride...10 mins ago, it was 37.3...& now is 38.4......we still wondering if we shd send him to Emergency...

Cos there has been a few times where by the time he was attended by Emergency, his fever was gone...& the doc couldn't do anything as welll.....& going to Emergency @ NUH is no joke..we have been there so many times that i lost count.....it's at least a 4 hours wait before anyone sees you...

So to send him to Emergency or not????

my last info session...

2008-06-25T07:22:00.008-07:00

the emotions are complex..relaxed, relieved, melacholic, happy & many more..

The info session that i have been doing for the last 1.5 years - tonight is my last session....feel sad that i am leaving my nice team & the work that I have tried hard to excel at...but at the same time, i also feel relieved and am glad that i get to do this last session before i leave my firm...

It's been a rollercoaster ride but I have also learned a great deal from this firm and my boss, which i believe will be of tremendous value to me, no matter what I will be doing in the future....no matter where i will be...

Bammie's Chives Box (韭菜盒子)

2008-06-22T08:07:00.014-07:00

The next thing that Mel taught me was even more tasty than the pizza......& think Mel is right....Canadians probably all know how to make their own pizza dough so who am I to compete with them??? I had better stick to Chinese food...anyway, my hubby loves Chinese food...hope that lise, daniel, diane, jerry & grandma will like and enjoy this if I have the chance to make it for them...^_^

Coming back to this dish, I have to admit - I have always had a secret crush on Mr Chives ^_^.... Chives are just one of the things in my life that makes me tremendously happy....just their smell makes me drool... so imagine how happy i am to master this recipe!!!

THANK YOU, MEL!!! ^_^

Ingredients for the fillings
Minced pork
Chives & Prawns , finely chopped
1 tsp salt & 2 tsps sugar
Some white pepper
2 tbsps soy sauce
2 tbsps sesame oil
Cooked fried eggs
In a bowl, mix all the above together till the salty level you want. But important to note that the whole thing shd be slightly sticky. For convenience, whatever amounts of chives i used, i used roughly the same amount of prawns.

Ingredients for the dough
1 kg Plain Flour

1 bowl of warm water
1 teaspoon salt & sugar

In a big mixing bowl, add the 1 kg of flour and create a slight hole in the middle & add teh sugar and salt. Now add the water gradually and use a spoon to start mixing. Now start kneading the dough with your hands & do it till it doesn't feel that sticky to your hand. Same process as the pizza dough now except that you only need to cover with damp cloth for about 5 mins to rise slightly. No need to wait as long as the pizza dough. When the dough is ready, divide them into smaller doughs, working with one dough at a time, covering the rest with the damp cloth to prevent drying. With a slightly floured surface, roll the dough into a ball using a rolling pin, roll each ball into a round flat skin. Spread the fillings onto half of the dough, and seal by folding & pinching the sides together tightly until it looks like the picture below (lol, it looks like a weird big curry puff, i know...^_^)

Now, in a big pan, heat some oil (just a little to coat the pan..no need to have too much oil). Once oil is hot, add each chive box in and remember to switch the flame to low flame. If the fire is too strong, the chive skin will all become charred before the fillings are cooked. So remember to adjust it to low flame. Flip it 3-4 times and it shd be ready to be served.

Bammie's Pizza

2008-06-22T07:11:00.008-07:00

felt really good this weekend.....there are often many weekends which i indulge in doing ABSOLUTELY NOTHING but laze around ... that feels damn unproductive... but this weekend, I was like a busy bee...and a happy one...^_^

Dad just had cataract surgery on Friday morning so i was in charge of bringing dearest papa to NUH for a checkup on Sat AT 8.30AM!!!!........Boy, I woke up at 6.30am loh!! but glad I wokr up earlier cos there was not many patients when we reached there and the doctor said that his surgery was a sucess though his eye is still very swollen but one thing's for sure - he can definitely see much clearer now...^_^ I hope that improves his quality of life..

After the checkup, it was time for me to go to Mel's place to learn pizza making but I not only learned how to make my own pizza from scratch.....I also learned to make Prawn & Chives Box....okie okie.....won't digress too much...^_^ have posted both recipes...

Bammie's Pizza

Ingredients for Pizza Toppings
Cooked Prawns (Cut into half)
Picnic Ham

Shredded Cheese
Fresh Mushrooms
Yellow Peppers

Ingredients for the dough
1 small bowl of warm water
2 tablespoons of olive oil
1 teaspoon of yeast (about 20g)

1 Kg Plain Flour

Some Sugar

Ingredients for the Pizza Base Sauce

2 to 3 big onions (chopped finely)

4 big tomatoes (chopped finely)

Salt & Black Pepper

We start with making the dough. In the small bowl of warm water, add the sugar & instant yeast and mix them together till they all dissolve. Add the oil and stir slightly. In a bigger mixing bowl, add the 1 kg of flour and create a slight hole in the middle. Add the water mixture gradually and use a spoon to start mixing. Now start kneading the dough with your hands & do it till it doesn't feel that sticky to your hand. Sprinkle some flour on your hands. That will help. Once the dough is ready, shape it into a round ball and cover it in a bowl with a damp cloth and let it rise. I dun know how long i waited. I cannot recall but it is pretty obvious when it's ready - the small ball of dough turns into a inflated big ball of dough!!! ^_^

Now we do the pizza base sauce. That's quite easy. In a big sauce pan, heat oil. Once oil is hot, add all the onions and stirfry till fragrant and a bit brownish. Then add all tomatoes and continue mixing them. After a while, switch to lower flame to let it simmer....add salt & pepper slightly.

Now that all ingredients are ready so we are ready to make the pizza. From the big dough, take out a small dough and place it on a lightly floured surface. Make sure this dough has some flour on all sides so that when you use a rolling pin to roll it flat, the dough would not stick to your rolling pin....Now using the rolling pin, roll it till the thickness that you prefer ( i prefer as thin as possible). Spread your base sauce and pizza toppings and bake the pizza in the oven for about 15 mins. Mine only takes 15 mins cos i can only make small pizzas due to the size of my oven & DA DA!!! here is my Bammie's Pizza...

My latest love....

2008-06-17T07:04:00.008-07:00

oh no no no......dun get me wrong..i'm still very much in love with hubby....^)^....just that a woman gonna keep herself busy right?? In case the men think we can't do w/o him.....lol

anyway, i have got a latest addiction and that is surfing FOOD BLOGS!!!!....In fact, i have listed a few of my favs in my "Fav Links"....go take a peep if u r as big a fan as me of WHAT ELSE BUT Food!!!!!

I think it takes a lot of love in one'e hearts to create yummilicious blogs...of course of course, we might never know...the person behind a yummilicious food blog might be the incarnation of DR EVIL!!!! but ermmmm, that's kinda besides the point la..

Point is I wana enrich myself after 18 July (my last day of work at WMI) & below are the list of things i will attempt to do:

1) Have lots of fun with hubby on our latest ATV!! Way cool..i still dun know how his ATV looks like though..asking my hubby to send me a pic via email is like waiting for SNAIL MAIL.......arghhhhhh.....

2) Learn creative writing and see if it's indeed my calling...cos cupcake making can't be my calling, u know since hubby is damn disgusted that I used cupcake pre-mix flour to bake...hahaa..what is wrong w cupcake pre-mix flour anyway?? he doesn't think that constitutes as real baking..I beg to differ..It's the same with cooking instant noodles, u know.. It takes a good chef to cook nice instant noodles.....hahaa...otherwise, restaurants in HongKong & Spore won't be charging so much $$$ for instant noodles..look at pic way below for proof

3) Learn photoshop from Lise and photography from....ermmmm someone or somewhere... everytime i see some nice photos in the net, i am full of envy and wish i had that skill too...to capture very ordinary stuff & remind us all how extraordinary and special "ordinary" really is...having a simple life is not as simple as most of us think..not because the world is too complex or your circumstances are too pressing....more often than not, our lives are complex because we chose to complicate them....we allow our greed & insecurities to get the better of us....we focus on what we dun have, rather than what we have....something i heard lately from someone really makes sense...."Our blessings really outweigh our unhappiness but we just never stop & count our blessings"...

4) Have my own food blog documenting all the nice recipes mommy has taught me.....yippie...

I feel like an handicap now....

2008-06-16T22:47:00.004-07:00

sighhh.....think i shd really focus on losing weight...Just had a fall yesterday during lunch with Evan, my colleague....didn't think my injury was all that serious cos I am 100% positive that I didn't sprain my ankle at all....just felt a teenie uncomfy in the feet....but ignored it and today, when i woke up, it was swollen and damn painful..went & consulted this Chinese Doctor @ Ghim Moh (near my place). Usually there's quite a long queue cos the Master is quite famous...Today was my lucky day...not only was the master there, there was no customers.....ermmmm....until he started attending to me & suddenly there were many customers....this Master is really very skillful..his son-in-law, this young chap also helps out at his place and supposed to be his disciple but he's not half as good as Master so I always asked to be attended by Master but at times, I really feel quite embarrassed because the son-in-law is so eager to learn the tricks of the trade and since I know him personally, I feel embarrased when i insist on waiting for Master, instead of being attended by him....but no choice, it's my leg we are talking about, you know??

Apparently, the Master possess years of experience in treating bones injury & sports injury.He is also involved in the Wushu Associations (worldwide) and The World Kuoshu Federation. So i always have full faith in him......ermmm, even though when he was treating me just now, he was on the phone chatting with his friend as well...lol..Ya, i know,...it seems damn unprofessional but he's pretty old and he is really skilled and affordable.....for rubbing my leg & hand (old injury) and 2 kinds of medicine, he only charges me $35 even though the actual charges shd be abt $50 plus, i think......so dun think i have much to complain about...

Tan Ching Ngee Chinese Physician
Blk 21, Ghim Moh Road, #01-153,
Singapore 270021Tel: 6463 2094
Email: chingngee_tan@yahoo.com.sg

He said that I have torn my inner ligament which is less painful than an actual anke sprain but more serious though cos the injury is more internal so will take a slower time to heal....but i can walk as per normal soon...just that I will have to really let it heal or I will be even more prone to falling in the future.... Sob Sob Sob........ Now, my left feet looks like a dumpling, all wrapped up!! lol..... hmmm, have to be more careful.....

My Swollen Gum & Me

2008-06-05T19:56:00.005-07:00

ermmm....so happy that i lost 2 kg but sad that I'M STILL SICK AFTER 2 WEEKS!!!....can't believe how sick i am...1st day was migraine, 2nd day till yesterday was flu and cough and now, i have a swollen gum that is so painful that i cannot eat.....and worse still, my flu & cough is still not gone yet....

I guess that means i will stay put at home during the weekends and just watch dvds all day long....lol..

anyway back to my 2kg....i'm so embarrased that i actually piled on 5 kg after my marriage...not that Jeff would mind....but I mind...so am trying my best to shed off at least 8 kg before i see hubby..so very excited that i have lost 2 kg.....Kambatte Kambatte Kambatte !!! 6 more kg to go!!^_^

I just have to make sure that i dun pile up the 2 kg & more when my illness is gone....wish me luck!

The LeSs-tHAn-pErfECt ME...

2008-06-01T08:35:00.005-07:00

sighh...sometimes i do wish i was a more sympathetic soul towards humans but i get irked and all uptight when women/men dun do things to protect themselves, end up being hurt by the other party, exclaim & cry on why the person did this to you despite u giving it all to him/her and yet still tell me they want to be the "give it my all & hope she/he come back to me"...i'm truly sorry but i really cannot comprehend this logic....neither can i ever understand why women will call & tell me that they commited sucide yesterday...ermmmm, then how come u r not dead yet??..

pls do not get me wrong..as a human & as a woman, i'm all for indulging in misery & self doubt & craziness when i am out of love.....In fact, my close friends would testify that i frequently indulge in short bouts of sillyness, craziness, self doubt & etc.....& I'm all ready to lend my listening ear for any of my friends who are out of love...but i resent...i do.....& i mean it...i really resent people who tell me ever so easily & frequently that they want to commit sucide bcos their man/woman is leaving them...they said it as if it's a monthly inspirational quote!!!!...that's my limit...i have no time to console someone who sees life so lightly....You may like to think of me as being a harsh and cold hearted woman...but i prefer to see myself as a human being who cherish her own life and happiness...& that makes it incredibly hard for me not to be critical of people who constantly want to die....

but yes, there are times where i wish i was a more sympathetic soul.....i really do,...

MY ugly blog skin...

2008-05-30T22:29:00.003-07:00

ermmm.....i hate my current blog skin leh....friends cannot write comments (not that anyone wants to write la..lol)......i usually rely on my techno savvy niece, Jody to help me with stuff like that but alas, she seems very busy lately leh....i dun even see her on msn....sighh

anyone can help huh?

2008-02-24T03:34:00.002-07:00

Yesterday's experience just shows that the world is indeed smaller than we think....cos u never know who u will meet...

i mean. i haven't met any of my secondary mates for the longest time....& lately, we were just thinking of arranging a meetup...never did i expect to meet them all (except lily) yesterday @ Meridien Hotel...

Not only that but they were all just seated at a table next to the table that my friend (the one meeting me) was waiting for me at...lol...

so the world is indeed a small one huh????? ^_^ well, i love coincidences as long as they are nice and pleasant ones...^_^

2008-02-20T07:20:00.008-07:00

Honestly, i'm quite disgusted with the blood donation system in singapore..and to think that they are forever encouraging people to donate blood...i think that it's enough that the notion that blood donation is painful and scary is already scaring people from taking the first step to donate blood...the unfairness of the system is the one that really turns me off and makes me want to puke!!!..

Last Monday was my first blood donation attempt....been wanting to do it for years but never mustered enough courage to do so....since i had to bring my dad to NUH anyway, i thought if i still dun step in today, i probably will never ever step in... and after the donation, i would urge people around me from now on to donate blood...cos it's really not scary, not that painful and according to the nurse, 1 donation can save at least 3 persons....so it's really a very meaningful thing to do..even my new colleague has already donated over 20 times in her lifetime...feel so paiseh that i only have to courage to do it now....lol

but coming back to my disgust, i was really quite peeved when they had past newspaper articles pasted on their board of donors who had donated without knowing that they had AIDS..and the newspaper article had their pictures and they were all fined and jailed simply because they had donated blood w/o being aware that they had aids...MOH could go on & on abt them lying on the questionairre...but when they ask such specific questions "have u had sex with more than 1 partner within the last 1 year?"...so what if a person did not have sex within the last 1 year?? Dun they know that HIV's window period could be more than 1 year??? Obviously, i agree that if you feel that u might be of risk of being HIV infected, then u shd not donate at all....but with the advancements in the medical field, shouldn't there be a better system to manage the donated blood until they are clear that the blood is clean...and even if there is no choice but to stick with this system, is there really a necessity to display their pictures...isn't jailing and fining them enough???? You may think that it is not fair to the ones who got aids from receiving donors' blood...i agree that it is not fair...i agree that it is a most horrendous thing...& I am all for punishing donors who do that if they are aware that they are high risk....but honestly, what does displaying of the pictures serve??? will teh receipent of that blood recover from aids?? will that recipent feel better abt getting aids??? Nothing will make them feel better that they were infected via a blood transfusion...so why do things to the extreme and display their pictures so that they have no more dignity???

It's almost as if the MOH is telling people that having aids is a crime...i love my country, together with its imperfections...but this method of treating people with aids is a shame to our medical system....& for your info, promiscuity is not a crime...maybe promiscuity might bring along consequences that eventually will lead to crime & maybe it's morally not right....but in the eyes of the law, promiscuity is not a crime...

2008-02-13T07:22:00.003-07:00

they say a mishap or accident that left you unharmed will bring u some gambling luck.....alas...how come it's not the case with me leh???

i was in a major accident the day before... i was in bus 111 anda bus 65 crashed into my bus and all the passengers (including myself) were flung off our seats and there were people who got injured....but i got away unscathed though my seat was quite dangerous cos i was sitting at the very first row and i could have easily hit my head against the glass....but i managed to get away unscathed...so i shd have quite a lot of gambling luck....

i even had the perfect number combination in mind.....6531..bought $1 big....hoping to strike a bit of $$$ to cover all my major expenses lately...but sighhh, luck is not on my side...with the need to fork out a lump sum to hire a new maid (cos my current maid is leaving in april) & another sum for a hearing kit for my dad in early march, man....these are all big ticket items lo....so sad....but life goes on and i guess, money that needs to be spent has to be spent....so what to do???

hmmm, maybe i will win sat's lottery....lol...hahaa...well, it's not wrong to dream and hope right???

2008-02-05T00:09:00.001-07:00

sighhh...i am such a bad wife....forever making my hubby mad...actually he's soo sweet to me already....what more can i ask for?? but everytime i get a bit upset or mad, i behave like a baby....sighh...and being such a nice natured man, i'm sure he is not mad at me....but i'm absolutely sure that he is disappointed in my "babish" behaviour....he was sharing with me some good news about us but yet i had to disappoint him time & time again.... :-( ....

sighh...i'm such a baby such a baby such a baby such a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a babysuch a baby

sigh

2008-02-04T08:45:00.005-07:00

today is such a happy & chirpy day....we hosted a farewell lunch for Eve...though i'm sad to see her leave because not only is she a good colleague but she is also like a kind mentor & a big sister to me....we even have the same birthday - 29 August....well, except for the difference in the "Year"....haha....oh boy!!I;m soo mean but i seriously think she is a very attractive person, not because she is just a pretty face but she has a pretty personality...and she has a "smiling" face...i like people w smiling faces...

anyway, we went to Flutes at the Fort Restaurant today at Fort Canning...i must say that the atmosphere is really darn good for dating....lol..too bad, i can't go dating now....heee.....Jeff, would u bring me dating there next time???? ^_^

well, back to the restaurant...it's a modern Australian restaurant housed within an old refurbished colonial bungalow. it's set against the beautiful backdrop of Fort Canning Park with lots of lush greenery.

The complimentary sourdough bread was very very good - served warm & soft & fluffy with a lot of pinenuts together with balsamic vinegar...man!! that was good & it satisfied our hunger pangs while we waited for our starter..

I had the set lunch, which consists of Baked Portobello Mushroom as the starter....pretty yummy but i think my home made ones taste better...heee..my main was Grilled Snapper FilletWith Stir-Fried Eggplant, Leek Flower and Soba Noodles, Oyster Sauce and Garlic & dessert was Warm Bread and Butter PuddingWith Hazelnut Praline Cream....i'm glad to say that the dessert did not fail me though i won't say that i am raving over the main dish but it was ok...

but i would love to come again cos i really liked the atmosphere....imagine yourself in a relaxed & congenial setting & having a unique vineyard-inspired dining experience in Singapore...what could a woman ask for more??

after lunch, they all went back to work while i met Andrew for coffee on my unit trusts....which is falling cos the darn market is falling...but honestly, i'm not too worried about it cos i always think that one shd look at such investments on a long term basis...e.g, 5-10 years.. worrying abt the short term fluctuations is not healthy...the saying is that the longer your time horizon, the lower your risk becomes....

after that, i had the impulse to make pasta for dinner tonight...and i made my favorite "Seafood Aglio Olio"...it's my first attempt but i think my efforts paid off and everyone enjoyed my pasta...i could be imagining it but i think i am becoming a better cook....

Ingredients
A Pack of Linguine
1/2 cup extra-virgin olive oil
finely chopped garlic
finely chopped parsley
freshly grated cheese
Light soya sauce & black pepper
Juices from the prawn heads
Sliced fresh mushrooms
Sliced sun dried tomatoes
Prawns & Pinenuts

Method
Cook pasta al dente. "Al Dente" means when the pasta has been cooked till it's firm to the bite & not too soggy & leave aside (no need to rinse with cold water but if it becomes sticky, just add some water). Stirfry the olive oil & garlic in a pan over medium heat cos olive oil dun take well to high heat. When the garlic starts turning a bit brown, add the parsley, prawns, mushrooms,sun dried tomatoes. I also added the juice that i extracted from the prawn heads cos it's a waste to throw away the juices (Mel taught me) & stirfry all the ingredients together until the prawns are cooked. Then add the pasta and mix it all up. I didn't add salt. Instead, i added some light soya sauce and black pepper. Stir well and serve. Sprinkle grated cheese & pinenuts all around & serve(optional)

2008-02-03T03:28:00.002-07:00

5 more days to Chinese New Year!! Yippie....not that i am looking very forward to it in the beginning but for unknown reasons, i always get more excited as the day approaches....& of cos, it doesn't hurt that i dun have to go to work tomorrow & Tues....heee..

well, it's a very lazy sunday for me....i haven't started on my springcleaning, as what i had promised to do....and i was bascially lazing and snuggling around my fluffy bed the whole day....though i did help with making of "Ngoh Hiang" for Chinese New Year...some people called it the "Five Spice Meat Roll".

Ingredients include:
- Minced Prawn
- Minced Pork w a bit of Fat
- Choppped Chestnuts
- Chopped Onions
- Chopped Spring Onions
- Sliced Carrot Shreds
- Sugar (Optional)
- Light soya sauce
- White Pepper
- Sesame Oil
- Five Spice Powder
- Corn Flour
- 2 Eggs (beaten)

Method:Mix minced pork, prawns, water chestnut, onion & carrot in a bowl. Add all seasoning and mix well.Add the spring onion and mix well.Add the beaten eggs, five spice powder & corn flour. Mix well.Wrap the fillings in the beancurd sheets & steam it till it's cooked. You can eat it immediately if u like the steamed version (healthier). But usually, after it's cooked and cooled, we will store in fridge (not freezer hor) until you want to serve to guests when they come visiting. Then deep fry in moderate fire till the Ngoh Hiang is golden brown.Serve with my mom's handmade belachan chilli sauce.

2008-02-02T09:45:00.000-07:00

ohhhhh......finally watched "Sweeny Todd" todae @ Plaza Sing....oh mannn i sooo love johnny depp....and of cos, me & russia forever like shows which are either anti-christ or damn fucking bloody....ermmm, i dun sound too normal huh???

dun get me wrong...i am not anti-christ at all...i just like controversial shows and stuff...& back to that movie...if any of u is expecting a truely horror show, haha....u can forget abt it....in fact, it's actually quite funny...

well, just watch it with a pinch of salt, won't u??

2008-01-29T22:56:00.002-07:00

on Monday, we (meaning the whole team), well...except for Cec cos she was sick....we all went down to Bistro GaGa at Mt Sophia ...it's a hidden gem in the midst of an old school..& Eve told us that the room that is used to house Bistro GaGa was actually her old Science Lab!! ^_^..must have brought back some fond memories...we were given warm toasted bread with balsamic vinegar olive oil...that tasted pretty good....but my aglio olio was a disappointment..not that it taste very bad but i would prefer Bakerz Inn version anytime, anyday lo...^_^but since i am not the one paying, i can't complain too much, u know...haha....the redeeming part of the dish was that it was full of pine nuts and sun dried tomatoes slices...Joyce also ordered the same dish but she seemed happy w it...lol

michael, the birthday boy & Eve ordered the Wagyu beef burger which, at first sight seems a bit too small for him but he didn't order a 2nd dish so i guess it must be more filling than it looks...mic thought the dish was rather good....he also ordered the crabcakes as a starter for himself but i wanted to eat as well...lol...the crabcakes was really good and juicy to the bite

as usual, the fussy eater, mdm Evan ordered the safest item on the menu - grilled pesto chicken.. which Mic teased Evan about "basically, u just ask them to give you a plain chicken"...lol..can't recall what the rest ordered..

As for dessert, me & Eve shared a warm chocolate fondant with vanilla bean ice cream..BOY!! that was one of the rare times that i regretted sharing a dessert man cos it was soooo darn good!!^_^

& for mic's birthday, we got him 2 music CDs and & Chinese horoscope coin collection...i was afraid that he would not like the 2 CDs cos i was entrusted w the task of buying the CDs and i didn't know his taste at all....so i decided to get him a compilation..1 smooth jazz cd and 1 Cafe del mar cd...he seems to like it, especially Cafe Del Mar...so all goes well ends well, i guess...

Overall, i like the place but getting there is too hard unless you drive...it's a nice place to hang out with friends...

A Bright & Sunny Saturday..^_^

2008-01-18T20:10:00.002-07:00

finally have picked myself up from my lousy mood and now feel that i am roaring to go....haha...no la...not literally roaring to go but just a term to signify my brighter feelings....

not that any problem is solved but i have just managed to modify my perspective and look at things @ a brighter side.....after all, no one owes me anything really.....so instead of whining all the time which is soo not constructive, i rather eat, drink & be merry ^_^

but i guess everyone goes through phases in their lives and i think it's OK to go through such phases....what's most important is what we learned after such phases....hahaha, is that what Darma Larma meant by "enlightenment"....

I love reading his books...not that i had been reading his books lately....hahaa...cos lately, i just want to watch http://www.crunchyroll.com/ for free korean dramas & not read anything too "Chim", u know....lol.... but seriously, i think his books really helps one to open his/her mind...most of us like to see things in our narrow little mind...that's not because we are stupid...but it just feels more comfortable & easier and human beings are creatures of habit....but once u are aware that it's not that hard to see things in a broader view, it's just not the same anymore...

Having said that, obviously, it is also very easy for any of us to just slip back to our old ways but i always believe very firmly that Everything can only be started with AWARENESS.....if u r not aware, u dun know what is wrong to begin with so u can't do much...but when u r aware.....that's a different story altogther......

"Awareness" does not necessarily imply "Understanding".....it's just an ability to be conscious of, feel or perceive.....to understand goes deeper than that....

Again, having said that, it doesn't mean i am any of the above...lol..i'm just a normal than normal human being...but it's my firm belief that no one owes us anything in life so no matter how lousy or depressed i feel at a certain phase, i know i will pick myself up eventually.....cos if life is only a bed of roses, one won't feel too happy as well....A good friend told me this before "Too much of anything Good becomes Bad"....i could not comprehend many years ago but now i understand & agree wholeheartedly with him.....no doubt he will always be a good friend...

life to me is a journey....during a journey, we are supposed to experience some sweetness for a while.....get a taste of happiness for a while.....immerse yourself in sorrow/depression for a while....indulge in being silly and crazy for a while...& go through the same cycle again but hopefully, we learn something new from every encounter that props us forward in life...that to me, would be my Big Fat Wonderful Life....

depressing sunday..

2008-01-06T06:47:00.002-07:00

can't believe the weekend just passed like that...i didn't even do anything much....all i did was to keep playing facebook and watch korean dramas online....sighhh....is that what some people do when they are procrastinating and feeling blue...by the way, when i am blue like i am now, my friends call me a "Bluey Pigeon"...that's my nickname when i am blue..

if this is simply a phrase that i am going thru, i hope it goes away fucking bloody soon...

Damn it....fucking bloody sunday!!!

Self Worth & Gordon Ramsey..what do they have in common??...

2007-12-30T11:51:00.002-07:00

Self Worth: Defined as belief in self: confidence in personal value and worth as an individual person in the Encarta Dictionary...

sometimes, at nights like tonight, my self worth feels at its lowest...& i hate and resent myself for allowing myself to feel like this..& to think that people around me always think it's damn funny whenever they hear stories of Mdm Mashimaro.....sighhh...but her words, her actions eats at me slowly like insects eaTinG away @ decomposed copses...i know i know....not exactly the most diplomatic way to phrase how i feel..but tis exactly how i feel...

well, thank godness i have a good man to balance myself and haha.....that man is not my hubby....it is non other than "Hell's Kitchen" Gordon Ramsey...LOL..no la...my hubby is indeed a good man but he was unavailable yesterday so what's a woman gonna do???

SETTLE FOR 2ND BEST!!!^_^

just seeing gordon torturing the candidates on tv is enough to make any repressed human being back to equilibrium....hahaaa...lol..dun believe me....go to youtube.com and search for gordon ramsey...he's funny, he makes cooking looks so much fun...but unlike the wholesome image that Jamie Oliver serves, Gordon has no qualms about his colorful language on national tv...man, his language is so damn colorful that "Fuck" under his usage can be applied anytime and anywhere...boy!! i'm reallie a sucker for reality tv....haha....& i can't wait to try out one of his recipe of pan fried salmon fillet....it looks so damn yummilicious....

woooo.......i made dumplings todae!!

2007-12-30T06:46:00.004-07:00

todae, i feel quite annoyed with my hubby and that kinda toook half the day of fun away from me...i know i know...i am a baby (tho i dun look like one...lol)....& he's been real sweet about everything...but sometimes, i just can't help but to feel that he still feels like a single man..otherwise, why would he go to Edmonton without informing me?? but well, what the heck...i'm just gonna forget abt this and move on...but at least, i made my unhappiness known to him....as if i ever can suppress how i feel anyway...lol..i'm reallie a paradox, am i not???lol^_^

well, by noon, i was back to my chirpy self ....anyway, not to digress further...i'm pretty impressed w myself tonight cos i made pork dumplings for my family tonight...wish jeff was here to taste it but what the heck?? i'm determined to stay mad at him for at least the next 3 days....he can go rot in his singlehood...haha...lol...i sound like a mad woman huh???...ok ok...back to my dumplings...ingredients include minced pork (choose the one w a bit of fat for better taste), lotsa finely chopped chives, light soya sauce, dark soya sauce, salt, pepper, some sugar & sesame oil...mix them all up nicely...wrap them up in the dumpling skins and Voila!!!...here comes my dumplings all nice and delicious....even my dad was impressed...

Kidz@Work Day & Year End party on 14 Dec 2007

2007-12-15T21:19:00.004-07:00

14 Dec was basically a working day where no one could possibly work at all cos there were soooo many kids running like mad....parents & grandparents running after the kids...haha...but it was all good healthy fun..From 8.30am to 12pm, it's basically all kids' activities..e.g, posing w Spongebob & Jimmy Neutron la...game activities la..big buffet spread...kids' contests making bookmarks & photoframes...in the afternoon, the arts & crafts done by the kids will be placed on sale and the sale proceeds will go towards a charity & matched by the company 1 to 1...which means for every $1.00 sale, the company will match $1.00 to the charity.....in a nutshell, it is a very meaningful event....we all have fun but without forgetting the unfortunate....

From 12pm to 6pm, it's adults' fun times...with free massages by the blind paid by the Company...it's very meaningful...cos all the proceeds of the massage services will go to the blind charity..& heee, since i helped to lead the blind masseurs up, wendy said she will let me go first...boy!!! it was very shiok (Defined as "Great" & an expression of satisfaction in Wikipedia)...
then there was the fruit carving contest which they reallie were very creative...e.g, making a haiwaii girl in bikini out of a cucumber & making a egytian mummy out of various vegetables...then at the end, there were adult game activities where great prizes could be won & at the end of the day, all staff collected a big fruit hamper and we all went home happily...

A Must Visit for tea lovers....hahaa...or tea leaf egg lovers...^_^

2007-12-10T23:49:00.003-07:00

was picked to buy a christmas gift for my handsome Consultant...let's call him superman cos he's a Clark kent lookalike, except that he's a Chinese instead of a Ang MoH....happened to chance upon the fact that he loves tea so decided to buy good tea leaves for him as a gift..went to Tea Bone Zen Mind Cafe @ Seah Street...& BOY!! this place is such a GEM...i been to seah street so many times but have never noticed it before...it's such a treasure tucked away in such a obscure corner that most of us would probably miss it...next time, i shall make it a point to walk slower and take a good look at the things around me....instead of rushing like mad all the time...anyway, there's 2 floors...the first floor houses the cafe...th 2nd floor houses the tea retail shop..no one was there when i went during lunch so i ordered their roasted rice green tea ($10) & their special tea leaf egg ($3.50)...ok ok, it by no means a cheap tea egg but the nice & unique atmosphere, the french music in the background, the friendly but non-intrusive staff makes it all worthwhile...it won't be a place that i will go often but it be reallie good once in a while to chill out there w a bunch of frends & just relax...& nearly forgot to mention that the egg yolk of the tea leaf egg is wet and mashy like a half boiled egg, instead of the normal hard boiled kind..it sooo yummilicious...^_^ & the tea i ordered came along w small snacks...

& i also bought a pot of flower tea for my dearest hubby..there are 5 kinds of tea inside...each opens up to become a different flower..it's his christmas gift..i'm sure that he will like the gift...since he appreciates tea drinking...but think i will only mail him his gift when i am back from tokyo...cos i'm sure i will buy gifts for him in tokyo as well....muacks..

i got my wedding album...^_^

2007-12-06T21:02:00.004-07:00

after weeks of waiting & anticipation, i finally received my wedding album....I must say that i really really love it to pieces.. i think i have been really lucky in terms of the planning for my marriage...even though i only had less than 2 months to prepare for everything, i met the nicest people EVERYWHERE!!!!...literally everywhere...^_^... From the start, i wasn't keen in donning a wedding dress cos i think i am too fat to look good in it but i met Euzart & Susan from Jawn Happy Ever After & they made me feel so pretty.... Then i was afraid that at such short notice, friends may not be able to help being my jie-meis...but all 13 of them were such wonderful & kindred souls...^_^& all said YES to me immediately... Then i was afraid that the hotel won't give a good deal cos it's a hot season for weddings...but Theresa from Grand Copthorne Waterfront Hotel was amazing, patient and never gave me crap...lol ...Then there are the friends i got to know from Singaporebrides.com..all of them sooo amazing, nice and helpful..Jac even was so kind and generous to lend me her bird cage..so happy to know you guys.. Then came the photography part....since hubby and me are both horizontally inclined, was afraid that the photos will look damn awful but KC & Marcus met my expectations & beyond... Then was afraid that hubby will feel tired and lousy cos we were so tired for the last few days with the preparations.....but in the end, he had fun too, he was his bubbly self and i loved him for making the wedding so wonderful for me... Of cos, the wedding day itself came with its fair share of hiccups....but like what KC said, "What the heck!"....we had lots of fun & call me crazy...but the inperfections & the hiccups made it the most beautiful & perfect wedding for me..haha...so u could say that it was a most inperfect perfect wedding....lol..& then i decided to do the album myself & get it published....the album just arrived yesterday and i'm totally in awe of the album...it tells a story, it's damn compact, it's personalised with my crap...what more can a woman ask for??? LOL ^_^...

Delayed Response Syndrome

2007-11-29T00:23:00.002-07:00

"Delayed Response Syndrome" is a term that i always use in jest with my friends whenever our responses a bit slow towards certain situations....i have always wondered if there is indeed a illness called "Delayed Response Syndrome"...lol...so here i COME, Internet....where almost everything & anything can be found....

Apparently, there is no such illness termed "Delayed Response Syndrome"...However there is one that is damn similar to it and that is the "Delayed Mortality Syndrome". It is a disease in which the fish becomes subject to illness and even death following a move to another environment. It is a disease well known and very familiar to the fish shipping industry.

Many fish transport well, or may seem to have at first. Unfortunately more than 80% of all fish moved will notshow signs of a problem until more than a week to a month later. This is the delayed response.

Think of it in relation to human beings to better understand the concept. If a human being was involved in a car crash but was not seriously hurt... we might be able to walk away and think we are ok... There are some of us who are indeed really ok but some will only feel the internal injury many days or even many months later. Like what my dad doctor told me, a spinal injury can take from months to years to present itself. So the delayed response can be a reality.
Sometimes even when we follow all the necessary steps to avoid disaster, it is still useless....hmmm, so what is the conclusion leh????

HEEE!!!! Life is short....Get a life Babe!!

Finally I am Married ^_^..& the feeling is kinda sweet but @ the same time weird

2007-11-25T20:36:00.005-07:00

ermm....still cannot believe that i actually forgot my own blog web address & the password...worst still, couldn't even recall which email i used to register my blog so arghhhhhhhhhhhhrrr....let's just say that it was most agonizing period cos i reallie wanted to post my wedding planning stuff here leh..

sighhhh....anyway, my wedding is finally over & i'm pretty happy with the way the wedding turned out to be....a bit gung ho ^_^ but i'm a bit gung ho myself anyway so what the heck..I reallie loved the photos that KC & Marcus took for me...KC has a blog himself and i felt that whatever he wrote abt my wedding reallie depicts how i felt so anyone keen to see his writings can go to the following website http://www.greymatterphotography.blogspot.com/

The photos that Marcus took for me were wonderful as well....You can see the wedding photos he took for me at http://www.kirei-image.com/gallery.html ... Enjoy...

Meanwhile, i am still consolidating all the other photos....

Neurolinguistic Programming...da da da

2007-09-20T22:40:00.002-07:00

having not been an active & responsible blogger for a while...ermmmm, since my birthday in August, feel that i should do my fan club justice by writing on a *CHIM* topic...(lol...as if a lot of people do read my blog to begin with...heee)..

ok ok...not to digress further..

so what exactly is NLP. Neuro-Linguistic Programming, or NLP, is a behavioural model that studies the patterns (programming) of how excellent individuals think (brain = neuro), communicate (linguistic) and act, to become successful.

NLP’s basic premise is that the human brain functions similarly to a computer, which executes 'programs' or mental strategies in ordered sequences of instructions (or internal representations). NLP specifically and objectively measures and identifies the physiological state and mental strategies a person is using at any point in time, and provides specific means to change and improve the mental and physiological state of the person.

Present State + Appropriate Resources --> Desired State

The above is the "DEEP & CHIM" explanation. But in short, after i attended NLP, i found it extremely useful to apply in my daily life...of cos, it's not easy to apply NLP in your daily life but like everything else in life, it takes conscious efforts..

One example would be in how i apply NLP to handle certain mean people in my life...When they are being mean, i imagine my eyes are closed and i visualise the mean person as an ugly black duck quacking & quacking away while i visualise myself as a beautiful & graceful swan swimming gracefully in the river....that helps me a great deal so for those of you who feel sckeptical....i am not saying u shd be a believer but @ least try it for yourself!! ^_^

It works for me..

counting to the day when i turn 29..

2007-08-28T06:08:00.003-07:00

hmm....what is a woman supposed to feel when she turns 29.....an age past the youngbies but an age not yet the confirmed oldbies..

truth be told, i dun feel too much of anything cos i am simply too busy with work...Since BOC came, i have not had any real rest..

but since i am able to return home slightly earlier today and have a moment to think, i decide to ponder on how i feel about turning 29 tomorrow....& u know what? i think i feel pretty good...i'm still not as financially stable as i aspire to be...I'm still not as slim as i aspire to be....i'm still not as good tempered as i aspire to be....& i'm still not as secure and confident as i aspire to be...

but despite all these and that & these & that.....i still feel rather good....i feel that despite these flaws, i feel that i'm in one of my happiest years.... well, at least i hope the happiness lasts for a while more....i feel like i am approaching the stage when i have lesser issues about the imperfect me.....i begin to really like myself for who i am and accept that i am only but a human...

& that it's normal to be subjected to bouts of complex emotions and feelings....afterall, isn't that what makes life more interesting????

so i guess, in a nutshell, i feel good though i won't have time to celebrate my birthday at all tomorrow....cos it's just work, work & work...

orh.....& before i end, just want to mention that i saw an article on the newspaper the other day which says that slim people who keep whining and saying they are fat in front of their friends who are really more on the heavy side are a bunch of insensitive, rude and low EQ people.......i hate to say this cos i can count at least more than 2 friends who does that all the time... but u know what? if u are one of those insensitive, rude & low EQ people who do that to your friends all the time without being aware, PLSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS GO GET A LIFE & STOP WHINING!!!

i'm falling..

2007-07-23T07:58:00.001-07:00

i honestly can't believe how much i have cried over the last 1 week over work.....i'm never a really ambitious person though people in my life always think i look like one..

but i have cried 4 times last week and once this morning.....all thanks to my boss who is forever errantic & shouting @ me till i have no more pride left.....

plssssssssss......just let this week be over soon & i will go on leave...ambithabha

welcome to the dark side folks...

2007-07-21T21:38:00.003-07:00

folks who went & watched the harry potter last week said that harry potter doesn't seem to be like before and is getting a tad too dark for their taste...& is not suitable for kids anymore...

i haven't personally watched the show and is not an avid fan either but i think that people who feel that they should not expose their 8 year old children to the show anymore is just being naive....kids as young as 4 years old are exposed to all kind of things, bad & good nowadays with the continued influence of the net and the media, their surroundings & even YOU, their own parents...

so, it does no help to restrict their exposure to the extreme....rather, we should teach them on how to manage the exposure....

but of cos, u could always say that it's easy for me to say that since i am not a parent...which i agree absolutely....It's certainly no easy feat but i think it's important to at least develop the awareness....bcos everything starts with a sense of awareness...with awareness, it doesn't necessarily means u will attain what u set out to achieve.....but it would mean u will or might make a conscious effort to remedy the situation...

Knots in my stomach just won't go away...

2007-07-14T09:08:00.004-07:00

i feel like an ant now....a damn nervous ant...the first program is starting on this coming Monday & yet, i feel like i need more days to prepare for it....never imagine i will miss Cec not being around...but i guess as time goes by, she has become more than a colleague, but also a mentor...

some people like to think & tell me that i am pure lucky in work, always meeting the nicest team to work with.....i prefer to think that i'm positive, rather than lucky....there's no such thing as the perfect work team simply because we are all mere human beings and as creatures of such, we are subject to a complexity of emotions so to me, there is never a perfect boss, a perfect colleague or a perfect team.....but i like to think that every single one of us have our flaws, strengths and weaknesses so we should try to think of ways and make conscious efforts to make our strengths compliment the needs of the team...

someone told me "isn't that being an hyprocrite?". well, it all depends on one's heart....to me, there are 2 kinds of people who make an effort to establish relationships....one is the kind who will not hesistate to build relationships at the expense of someone else....the other kind is the one who does it with a clear conscience...& i think that's a right attitude....

i can't change the world & i dun believe in changing myself for the world....but i believe in modifying my behaviour in a balanced way to suit the environment better, as long as the modification does not alter my personality in its truest sense....that's good enough for me...

my weird days as a BUN travelling around the world in 365 days

2007-07-08T01:05:00.002-07:00

YES! I think i'm indeed a Bun....the yummilicious kind with red bean fillings inside which is soft on the outside & moist inside....(Look! This is not Porn ok!!...I AM A real bun).....LOL....I am a ordinary Bun who has had a extra-ordinary life as a Bun cos i always meet the weirdest people on earth, i think....

i have a best friend, Ms Russia who constantly terrorize us with her fierce antics....a *Sa Lang* godma who can fly all the way to Hong Kong, just so that she can buy a $3,000 TOD handbag at...hmm, maybe $200 cheaper than spore....but yet think that children color pencils are expensive...lol...

Jenny who wipes her whole face immediately after finishing a wedge of watermelon.....i mean literally wiping her face after she finish eating the red juicy parts......she reckon that as long as it's at a convenient time, everyone shd do things that are healthy so rather than using extra effort to do DIY masks or buy expensive face masks, why dun we just use the most natural ingredient and just literally use it on the face after eating.....& this friend of mine, she will finish every single food that's on the table...mind u...she's not greedy for food....she just doesn't like to waste stuff so she will never allow leftovers to be there.....she will not only literally finish all the food...she will wipe comb all the sauces....try to imagine a puppy licking away at the remains of a bowl....ok ok, she looks more civilised than that...but it's hard to describe w/o going to the puppy part, u know??? haha...& she not only eats durians,.....she eats the durian seeds as well....OMG!!!! the things she does never cease to amaze me..i think we could devote a whole book to her... lol...heee, give u guys a hint...she is one of the lady in the photo....wana make a guess? U only got 1 chance ok???

well, enough of my weird friends...there are many more but some are *Classified* files....which means i will die if i wrote about it... lol...so i can only think about it

& for all u know, people around me may think i am weird tooo..... lol...

anyway, i had a lot of fun last night at Harrys with Mel, wangnan, wangce, jenny, Mark, robin & 2 other guys that i can't recall their names...it's been a long while since i really partied and danced so i must say it feels really good....but i'm still a very very lousy drinker....all it took was 1 screwdriver & i had to have a few glasses of orange juices to hydrate myself back again....oh man!!! i really dun behave like a 28 year old, do i???lol

i love my donuts..

2007-06-08T22:48:00.003-07:00

heee....doesn't the donuts look reallie yummilicious??? & they are not just nice to look at....they are really yummy...ermmmm, though i still dun think i will queue 2-3 hours for it......Donut Factory just opened a couple of months ago and seems like, now queuing for donuts are all the craze now cos there have been a few other outlets (opened by different people)..

singaporeans are reallie crazy over food & queues.... hahaa...if there's a queue and it's for cheap and good food, singaporeans will join the craze easily....

heee.....fortunately, i got a crazy best friend who is infatuated with the donuts...so geee, i no need to queue can also get to eat yummy donuts...oh and my best friend's name is Russia.....she is called Russia cos she will send a bomb to my house if i provoke her.....& beware, dun let her go hungry cos that's when she goes crazy....hahaa....but truth be told, i couldn't ask for a better fren....and i think the older she gets, the better she becomes..shhhhhh, she gonna kill me when she see this......lol...

i been reallie lazy lately....no visits to the gym....no eating of healthy food...i think i am in total indulgence...ever since i started this new job which requires so much of my brain cells which i am seriously lacking in, i find myself doing brainless stuff whenever i am free.....awwww, i dun even read *Chim* stuff nowadays.....nowadays, i just wana laze, eat yummy junk food (awwww, i miss jeff's homemade ribs and salmon omelette)...read trashy novels....sleep, sleep & sleep.....hahaa, I certainly dun sound like an ambitious associate director hor???? ^_^...well, i guess that's because my peak period is coming next month...honestly, i am nervous about next month.....with so many programmes coming up and all parked under my portfolio, i am scared to death....guess, i am reallie not as confident as my external self...underneath my confident shell is a timid scaredy cat....in this aspect, i think i'm like my mom...except that she looks timid on the outside as well...lol..

well, i just have to tell myself that i can do this.....not much of a choice...& since people seem to have so much confidence in me, i really want to do my best....i'm grateful that i have nice colleagues, no matter where i go....they believe in me more than i believe in myself......maybe i am just under-rating myself but no matter what, i'm determined to learn the good stuff here in my new workplace...i think there's really a lot i can learn here.....